Fifth Down

Last week I went bold picking the Giants over the Chargers correctly. Well I’m going bold in back to back weeks. Let’s do this! It’s time for Six for Sunday…on a Saturday!

Bo knows upsets: Broncos @ Eagles

It’s a mixed bag with Bo. Some people love him. Some people are very critical of him. I land somewhere in between. I think he is pretty good but still has a lot to prove. He really has never really beaten a good team with a good quarterback besides a random win in week 3 of last year against the Bucs. He is a little risky out there and turns the ball over more than Bronco fans would want. But I think he is due a big victory. The Broncos are 2-2 but both their losses are on last minute field goals. Bronco fans really like talking about that, especially the Colts games. However, their 2 wins aren’t impressive either, squeaking by the lowly Titans and a terrible Bengals team led by Jake Browning. The Eagles on the other hand are 4-0 narrowly beating 3 good teams and the Cowboys. But their defense seems to have some holes and they don’t seem to be able to throw the ball down the field besides one half of football against the Rams. I think they will figure out their passing game but not this week against this stingy Broncos D. I’d make this pick with more conviction if the Broncos were home, but give me the Broncos anyway. The Eagles finally get a false start called on a tush push turning a 4th and 1 into a 4th and 6 at the end of the game and they can’t convert.

Broncos 23 Eagles 20

Must win but not must see: Texans @ what’s left of the Ravens

I predicted both these teams would win their divisions. A big reason was because I thought they both had the best QB and the best coach in their divisions. While that may be true, it hasn’t seem that true outside of Lamar…and he is hurt and not playing this week. The Texans offense has been atrocious all season. Their one win is against the terrible Titans. With both the Colts and Jaguars sitting at 3-1 falling to 1-5 would all but seal their fate. Meanwhile the Ravens are playing with about half their team. They have basically become the 49ers of the AFC but with worse results. Even when Lamar is healthy, this team can’t seem to win big games. Now they are rolling Cooper Rush out there. Their defense is terrible and keeps getting worse with all the injuries. The Ravens need a win as well. Right now they are tied with the Browns in last place. You sort of feel like if they can get healthy then maybe they’ll have a shot. But it might be too late by then. One of my fantasy teams is in the same boat. My top 3 picks, Ceedee Lamb, Lamar and Mike Evans are all hurt. But there is light at the end of the tunnel as by week 8 all should be back, and Rashee Rice will be off suspension. But I feel the Ravens pain. The difference is my fake football team is 3-1 not 1-3. I think the Ravens lean into the run more and Derek Henry has a good game. But the one good thing the Texans have is their defense. Give me the Texans in an ugly game that no one wants to watch.

Texans 19 Ravens 15

Panther Reunion Party: Bucs @ Seahawks

This is a funny quarterback match up between two of the top 3 picks from the 2018 draft. Both of them were drafted by just awful franchises that are still awful to this day and are yet to solve their quarterback problems. I mean those teams ran Joe Flacco and Justin Fields out there last week. These same two quarterbacks once spent a few weeks on the roster together of another terrible franchise, the Carolina Panthers. They too were trying and are still trying to solve their quarterback issues. Both guys left and have found success elsewhere. Baker with the Bucs and then Darnold with the Vikings last year and Seattle this year. It’s almost like they weren’t bad quarterbacks they were just on really crappy teams. This should be a great game. Seattle has exceeded my expectations early this year. Baker has done Baker things but they really have only beaten 3 bad teams. However, they have also done so with some key injuries. I think this will go back and forth as both defenses are playing well but both offenses can score as well. In a close game, Baker does tend to make some risky throws but I still trust Baker more in this spot. Give me the Bucs in the slight upset on the road.

Bucs 27 Seahawks 24

Battle of the Banged up offenses: Commanders @ Chargers (but not really because the Chargers don’t really play home games and I am sure the Commanders will have more fans there).

In good news for the Commanders, Jayden Daniels is back and boy do they need him. Unfortunately, they will still be playing short handed as Scary Terry is hurt and not playing and Austin Ekeler is out for the season and maybe his career. On the other side, the issue isn’t the skill guys but instead their offensive line…or lack there of. The Chargers lost their starting left tackle before the season started. They moved their right tackle to the left and then he got hurt and is out a few weeks. So now they have two back up offensive tackles playing. That was their built in excuse for losing to the Giants last week. Well there is no time for excuses with the Chiefs and Broncos only a game behind them. The Chargers are at home, but that really isn’t an advantage because they don’t have any fans. This should be another good game with two good quarterbacks on a neutral field. I think Jayden gives the Commanders a lift and the win outright to drop the Chargers to 3-2.

Commanders 31 Chargers 27

Look what you Maye me do: Patriots at Bills

The Sunday night could be a fun one. Or it could just be another blow out as the Bills are favored by 8.5 points. The Bills are breaking out their “cold front” uniforms where they dress in all white. Seems like they should have saved these for when it is actually cold, but whatever. The Bills have been rolling since their come from behind victory against the Ravens. But in those wins they have beaten the Jets, Dolphins and Saints. Not exactly the best of the best in the league. The Bills have one of the easiest schedules in the league. The Patriots are getting better and if they didn’t fumble 47 times against the Steelers they would be 3-1 instead of 2-2. Drake Maye is playing great. Their defense is legit. And they have a good coach that knows how to win these sort of games. All of this leads me to pick the Patriots to pull the upset especially since I don’t think the Bills defense is that good. Then I remembered the Bills have Josh Allen. He’s pretty good at football. Vrabel and the Patriots play well and keep it close but in the end Allen is just too much and the Bills escape with the victory. But the Patriots do cover and hey, anything is better than a tie.

Bills 30 Patriots 24

Are we back? I think we are back. Yeah, we are definitely back. Man, I hope we are back: Chiefs @ Jaguars

The Chiefs had an offensive explosion that I haven’t seen since 2022. It was fun and the most relaxing game I have watched the Chiefs play in recent memory. With Worthy back, the offense seems to be clicking. However, they were playing the Ravens defense who by the end of the game were down 6 or 7 starters. The Jaguars will be able to put up more of a fight. They are 3-1 and tied with the Colts for the division lead. They are playing at home and will be highly motivated to finally beat Pat and the Chiefs on this Monday night match up. The Chiefs on the other side will be motivated to win their 3rd in a row and hopefully keep the offense moving. The Jaguars D is opportunistic leading the league in turnovers. But they do give up a lot of yards. Trevor Lawrence is not playing great and tends to make some bad decisions and turn the ball over a little himself. The Chiefs don’t turn the ball over a lot and if they can win the turnover battle in this one they should win. The defense is playing on a high level and could create a couple of turnovers themselves. Or Trevor might hand them a couple. They are busting out their white on white jerseys and they usually win in those. It’s close for a while but the Chiefs pull away in the second half. The Chiefs keep things rolling and force a 3 way tie in the AFC West.

Chiefs 27 Jaguars 17

It’s Thursday, which means it is time for Thursday night football. This game looked like it would be a good one. But now the 49ers are without their QB, TE, top 3 WRs and best defensive player. But don’t fret, I still have 10 awesome reasons to watch tonight’s game.

10. Puka!

Puka is having an incredible year so far and is arguably the best receiver in the league. Plus his name is Puka!

9. Mac Jones basically being Brock Purdy.

Jones looked like he was going to be a failure in this league but it turns out he is just basically Brock Purdy 2.0. You can watch him be average most of the game with a few good plays.

8. See who gets hurt for the 49ers this week.

If you are a fan of the blue tent on the sideline, this game is for you!

7. You can trick your wife into watching football.

“Hey babe, let’s look at amazon tonight.” She will be all about it…for like 30 seconds.

6. Watch former terrible receivers that Mahomes won Super Bowls with.

MVS, Skyy Moore and Demarcus Robinson all play for the 49ers now. And due to injuries…they are all going to be on the field.

5. Watch Blake Corum have a massive game.

Kyren Williams is on my fantasy team. I actually have Corum on my bench. So I fully expect Corum to have 80 yards and 2 tds while the 49ers shut down Williams. It should be a good time.

4. Watch a Shanahan lose.

As a Chiefs fan, I was never a big Mike Shanahan fan. I don’t really have anything against Kyle but I don’t like him that much either. So it is always a pretty good day when a Shanahan loses.

3. Watch Matthew Stafford ball out.

The old man still has it. And I use the term old man loosely since he is still 9 years younger than me. But he is off to a great start. I assume he will keep it rolling against what is left of the 49ers.

2. You get to watch CMC catch 100 passes.

CMC is already 3rd in receptions this year. Not on the team, but in the league. Now the 49ers are missing all their receivers and their back up QB is playing. Look for Mr. Check down to get a lot of action. Assuming he doesn’t get hurt.

1. This game does matter.

As much as I am making fun of this game, these two teams along with the Seahawks are tied for first place in the West. And the Seahawks have a tough game coming up with the Bucs. So there is a good chance that the winner of this game is in first place in the division. In other words, the Rams are going to be in first place in the division.

I’m a day later than normal. But in order to get the precision and accuracy needed to create the most accurate NFL rankings in all the land, sometimes it takes an extra day. Also, I have a real job and a dog that I had to take to the vet yesterday. But no matter the reason! Here are the absolute most perfect rankings of all the NFL teams going into week 5.

O’fer: Jets, Titans, Saints

All the teams are O’fer. O for four. The Jets somehow got worse than last year. Their coach acts tough but the team does not. The Titans head coach gave up calling plays and the offense got even worse. And the Saints don’t have any good players.

Better off not showing up: Panthers, Browns, Bengals

These teams are slightly ahead of the category above them because they have won at least 1 game. But the Panthers looked like a JV team playing the Patriots. The Browns have a terrible offense and terrible play calling. And the Bengals couldn’t even snap the ball before getting a penalty. Also, the Bengals need to trade for Jameis Winston immediately. With Chase and Higgins, he would throw for 50 touchdowns and 50 interceptions and it would be the most entertaining thing in years.

Raiders gonna Raider: Raiders

Only the Raiders can pull off defeats like this past week. You are playing the lowly Bears at home and then Geno throws 3 picks but yet you still have a chance to win. You drive down the field to kick the game winning field goal and it gets blocked. Classic Raiders.

A Spark or a Flame?: Bears, Falcons, Dolphins, Giants, Texans

These teams all won in week 4 and looked pretty good doing it. Is it the beginning of something or just a brief spark that will not ignite into anything bigger? Only time will tell. But yeah, it’s just a brief spark.

Might be in trouble: Vikings, Ravens

Both these teams have issues. The Vikings can’t get consistent functional quarterback play. The Ravens have lost half their guys on defense and now their quarterback is hurt. Things are not looking good. At least the Vikings get to play the Browns this week. Meanwhile the Ravens don’t even know who their quarterback is going to be this week. Ouch.

Limited but entertaining: Patriots, Cardinals

These two teams are 2-2. They will probably finish 8-9 or 9-8. But they will be fun along the way.

Kissing their sister: Cowboys and Packers

I have always found the saying “a tie is like kissing your sister” as a bit odd. My sister is awesome and one of my best friends but at no point do I want to kiss her. I would much rather tie in a sports game than kiss my sister. In fact, I would rather lose in a sports game than kiss my sister. Anyway, these teams tied this week so their punishment is to be in this section of the rankings and your punishment for them tying is that you have to read about my feelings about kissing my sister.

Team ER: Commanders, 49ers

It is no surprise seeing the 49ers on this list. They basically invented this list. But the Commanders are also banged up. They need Jayden Daniels back asap. And having scary Terry back would help too.

First round playoff loss, here we come!: Steelers

The Steelers have the makings of a classic team that will win 9-11 games based upon a tough defense, good enough offense and a favorable schedule that makes the playoffs and loses immediately. Just like the last 5 Steelers teams.

Scrappy teams I underrated: Seahawks, Jaguars, Colts

I did not see any of these teams coming. I was higher on the Colts than most but not this high. I thought the Seahawks would be worse than last year and they are better. And I finally gave up on the Jaguars and of course now they are good. So you are welcome Jacksonville fans. I hope both of you are really happy.

The rest of the west: Broncos, Chargers, Chiefs

I’m not sure what is really going on with any of these teams. They have all had highs and lows. The Broncos and Chiefs both looked better on offense but they were playing the bengals and what is left of the ravens. Meanwhile the Chargers looked worse on offense and are running out of offensive tackles. This will be a big week for the division but more on that in Five for Friday. For now, I think they are all pretty good but none of them are great yet. And the Raiders are excluded because they suck like always.

Scrappy teams with Quarterbacks I love: Rams and Bucs

Both these teams have a scrappy, never quit attitude with winners at quarterback. I love Baker and have always been a Stafford fan as well. They are in every game and can make big plays when it matters. The aren’t the best of the best yet but they are on the next level below that.

Shake if Goff: Lions

The Lions had a rough week one but they have obviously shaked it Goff because they have been awesome the last 3 weeks and don’t show any signs of stopping.

September AFC Champs: Bills

Just like every year, the Bills are the best team in the AFC in September. January is a different story…but maybe this year will be different. But probably not.

Who needs passing?: Eagles

The Eagles continue their odd winning ways, this week winning without completing a pass in the second half. But who needs passing yards as long as you are barely winning. But hey, to be the champs you got to beat the champs. And no one has done that so far.

Well, I didn’t get Five for Friday done in time so instead you get an extra game this week. So you’re welcome. Let’s dive in.

Luck of the Irish: Vikings @ Steelers but not really because the game is in Ireland

The NFL didn’t give you an extra game but they did give you an extra time to watch a game with the first of 4 in a row games in Europe. Speaking of NFL Europe…do you all remember NFL Europe the league? It was formerly the World League but then the American teams dropped out. I remember this being a thing for like a year or two. But did you know the league lasted 16 years? It’s worth a google. Anyway, the NFL is punishing their American fans by making them wake up early to watch their favorite teams so the NFL can work on their world brand. This is the one time it pays off to live in Eastern time. A 9:30 kickoff isn’t too bad but here in the Mountain time zone, you are looking at a 7:30 kickoff. Imagine being a Vikings fan and living in California and having to get up at 6:30 on the weekend. Some of you are probably thinking I get up that early anyway. Well no one likes overly productive people so you should change your ways. Anyway, this one is a less than exciting one to wake up for unless you are real fired up to watch Carson Wentz dual it out with Old Man Rodgers. Rodgers said this week his family heritage is Irish and he has been meaning to go there. I guess he has just been too busy living in the dark or whatever to get over there. As far as the actual football game, the Vikings defense is real good and the Steelers defense has just been okay so far this year. With two so so quarterbacks battling it out, give me the better D.

Vikings 24 Steelers 16

Be Curious, not judgemental: Chargers @ Giants

One of my favorite scenes in any television show ever is the dart scene in season 1 of Ted Lasso. If you haven’t seen it before then stop reading and go watch it and then come back and finish reading. What does that scene have to do with this game? Well this will be the first Dart scene in the NFL as Jaxson Dart gets his first start. I’m not sure why the benched Russ, he looked so good on Sunday night. But perhaps it was his throws to no one down on the goal line towards the end of the game. So the Giants are finally giving the world what we want. Let’s start with the obvious, Jaxson Dart is a great football name. So he’s gotta be good. Unfortunately for him, he is facing a tough Chargers d. The Chargers have been one of the top teams in the league so far this year. But people have been underestimating the Giants for years…and rightfully so because they have been terrible. The Chargers are obviously better pretty much everywhere and so this is an obvious Chargers win. But as the great Lee Corso used to say “Not so fast!” This is my upset special! The Chargers have just gone through the AFC West gauntlet and now have to travel through 3 time zones to play a game at 10 AM their time against a team that has been terrible. The Giants players and fans have been waiting for the Dart show. Their starting running back is hurt which means more Skatteboo which again, everyone wants. The team rallies around the rookies and they get a bullseye and win the game.

Giants 27 Chargers 24

The tush push vs the Bake Show: Eagles @ Bucs

Oddly enough, the Bucs have had the Eagles number of late having won most of the recent match ups. The Eagles seem to have a way of finding ways to win this year. So do the Bucs and their way of winning is none other than the Bake show. Baker is probably my favorite quarterback in the league not named Patrick Mahomes. The Eagles are a really good football team and probably have the best roster in the league. Baker and the Bucs have won 3 close games and they certainly look like a top team. However, those 3 wins are against teams that are a combined 1-8 so far this year. The Bucs are shorthanded on the offensive line and are missing their best receiver in Mike Evans. Both these teams only play close games so this should be a good one. I think the Eagles get away with a false start or two and win in some random way once again.

Eagles 27 Bucs 24

Quote the Raven…never more: Ravens @ Chiefs

The Ravens are everyone’s offseason champs as we hear about their elite roster and MVP quarterback. The Chiefs had a wide range of predictions this offseason and now everyone is talking about how bad they are and how they are finished while saying the Ravens are fine. Both teams are 1-2 and one of them is going to be 1-3. Most are predicting it will be the Chiefs but I am not so sure. the Ravens look better offensively but look just awful on defense. Pat always plays well against the Ravens. Meanwhile the Chiefs defense has looked good after a bad week 1. The Ravens offense has looked mostly good but they also seemed very frustrated since losing a heartbreaker in week 1 to the Bills. Lamar seems to struggle against Spags led defenses. The Chiefs also get Worthy back. And Pat rarely loses as an underdog and especially a home underdog although he just lose in that scenario to the Eagles. I think the Chiefs get a statement win that says they aren’t going anywhere while the Ravens lose in some heartbreaking way and decide they don’t want to come to arrowhead never more.

Chiefs 30 Ravens 24

Return of the guy who can’t stop the run: Packers @ Cowboys

This game has been highlighted by all NFL fans as Micah Parsons returns to Dallas. Jerry Jones has made a lot of noise with comments about how he didn’t need to talk to Micah’s agent because he already talked to Micah. It’s actually against the NFL rules to talk directly to a player about their contract but I guess because it is Jerry no one cares. Once he traded Micah, all his talk is about how Micah couldn’t stop the run and they needed players who could stop the run. Well now they can’t stop the run or the pass. But Jerry doubled down this week talking about how they didn’t win a Super Bowl with Micah. Combine Jerry’s nonsense and Dallas’s just terrible defense with an angry Packers team that is coming off a bad loss and I think this will be a blow out on Sunday night. Look for both Jordan Love and Micah to have big nights. And after the game look for Jerry Jones to focus on the fact that they held the Packers under 100 yards rushing even though they gave up 400 yards passing.

Packers 45 Cowboys 20

Bo knows blowouts?: Bengals @ Broncos

I thought about writing about the other Monday night game, the Jets at the Dolphins but just like you don’t want to watch that game, I don’t want to write about it either. So let’s talk about the Bengals. The Bengals are bad. They are terrible on defense just like last year. But now with Burrow hurt, they are bad on offense. Jake Browning is out here trying to break the record for most interceptions or something. This week he faces one of the best defenses in the league. The Bengals O line is so bad. The Broncos might have 20 sacks. On the other side of things, the Broncos are 1-2 with both losses coming on last second field goals. Bo Nix has looked less than great. But just like last year, Bo has a chance to feast on bad teams starting this week. I think this is a bounce back for Bo and he has himself a day against this awful Bengals D. Give me the Broncos with a big home victory.

Broncos 34 Bengals 17

It’s Thursday which means it is time for the first game of the week. It’s a battle of the birds, with the Cardinals hosting the Seahawks. You may be thinking who cares about either of these teams. But I’ll give you 10 reasons to inspire you to watch. Here we go.

10. Watch Marvin Harrison go off for over 100 yards and 2 tds.

Harrison is on one of my fantasy teams and has been a massive disappointment so far this season. Last week he dropped a td in the endzone and dropped another pass that would have likely been a very long td. So I am benching him this week which means he will have a massive game.

9. See how many times they mention Kyler Murray’s height.

Much like Zacchaeus, Kyler is a short is stature. The announcers typically love to talk about it.

8. Check out the color rush uniforms

As a Chiefs fan, they most exciting uniform change we get to see is when they wear white pants with their white jerseys. But tonight both teams will rocking new threads.

7. Watch Zach Charbonnet score multiple tds.

Charbonnet had a good game in week 1 and was on my fantasy team’s bench. I started him in week 2 and he didn’t do anything. Last week he was injured. I benched most of my team and almost started Charbonnet. But went with Trey Benson instead. So Charbonnet will obviously do very well tonight.

6. Watch Trey Benson suck or get injured.

Since I am starting Benson over Charbonnet, I am sure I have cursed his fantasy value. You’re welcome fantasy players across the world.

5. See if Sam Darnold sees ghosts.

Darnold has been mostly terrible in the league and even once was quoted on the sideline saying he saw ghosts out there. He was good last year but Carson Wentz looked good with that same team on Sunday. The verdict is still out on Darnold for this season.

4. See which team loses in heart breaking fashion.

These teams seem pretty equal but they both have lost heart breakers to the 49ers already this season. They are mostly perennial losers minus a few good years from the Seahawks and that one time the Cardinals were good. So it seems like this game will go down to the wire and one of these teams will lose in some crushing fashion. My money is on the Cardinals.

3. It’s better than anything else on TV.

What else are you going to watch tonight? I don’t even really watch anything non sports related besides when the wife makes me watch cooking and baking shows. My wife loves those shows. Ironically she doesn’t really like to cook or bake. Also, how many damn shows does Gordon Ramsey need? He’s on like every night.

2. Bad football is still good football.

Both these teams defenses are pretty good and both quarterbacks and teams are kind of chokes. I don’t expect this to be that good of a game. But watching bad football is still better than watching no football.

1. See which bird has to fly south in the standings.

See what I did there? Because birds fly south in the winter. And one of these teams is going to move down in the standings. And south is down on the map. Get it. Anyway, I always love fun mascot match ups and this is one of those. Also, there are a lot of bird teams in the league. Most of which aren’t all that intimidating.

So there you go. Have fun watching tonight and tune in tomorrow for 5 for Friday.

3 weeks down and 15 to go. My Chiefs finally won a game. So that’s good. Let’s see how they and the other 31 teams measure up in the most accurate and respected rankings in the industry. (Spoiler alert, I am not actually in the industry).

Somehow are getting worse: Saints, Titans, Giants

All these teams have been bad this year but were even worse this week. Russ was so bad for the Giants that he is already benched after 3 weeks into the season. I guess he can now say “Let’s Ride…the bench.”

One of these teams is going to win in Week 4: Jets, Dolphins

Don’t forget to tune in Monday next week when these two disaster teams play each other. How many more games do the Dolphins have to lose before they fire their coach? I’m saying two more.

NFC South Pretenders: Panthers, Falcons

Both of these teams were supposed to be ready to challenge the Bucs in the South but right now it appears they can’t challenge anyone besides themselves.

No D Dallas: Cowboys

Is your quarterback struggling? Don’t worry, I have the perfect prescription. Playing the Dallas Cowboys

Had a good week but still suck: Browns, Bears

Both these team won, the Browns with the upset over the Packers who were talking about going undefeated. The Bears had an offensive explosion but it was against the Cowboys.

Best 0-3 team: Texans

They aren’t as bad as the teams above them but I am starting to think they aren’t good.

Burrowlessly bad: Bengals

Woof. This team is not good with Burrow. They are really bad without him.

Teams that are just “eh”: Raiders, Patriots, Steelers

None of these teams are terrible. They just all have issues and none of them are that exciting.

2-1 teams that I don’t think I believe in: Vikings, Jaguars

Vikings are a roller coaster and I’m not putting a lot of weight in the fact that they crushed the Burrowless Bengals. And then you have the Jaguars who lost to the Burrowless Bengals.

1-2 teams I think I believe in: Broncos, Chiefs, Ravens

The Broncos D is legit. Bo Nix has been shaky. But I think they will make the playoffs. The Chiefs look awful but they are the Chiefs so I think they will turn it around. The Ravens will beat themselves but not until the playoffs. They looked very upset during the Lions game and the vibe doesn’t seem great but their division sucks. So they will be alright.

Indiana Jones and the undefeated season: Colts

The Colts are undefeated being led by Daniel Jones just like we all predicted.

The NFC West: 49ers, Seahawks, Cardinals and Rams

I know the 49ers are undefeated but they are dropping players due to injury left and right. All the other teams are 2-1 and pretty good but not great.

NFC Super Bowl Contenders: Packers, Commanders and Lions

The Packers played terrible last week but they are still good. Commanders need to get Jayden Daniels back but when they do they will be in the mix. The Lions have been awesome the last two weeks and seem to be back to their dominating ways.

Bake show is still Baking: Bucs

Sure, they have sort of been scraping by but they find ways to win and I love Baker. They are probably overrated here but they are 3-0 and have a chance to knock off the champs this week.

September AFC West Champs: Chargers

Hey credit to where credit goes. The Chargers look tough. They also oddly started the first 3 weeks playing all their divisional rivals. I am still confident that the Chargers will charger it up. But right now they are a top team.

AFC home field advantage: Bills

The Bills are awesome and their schedule is easy. I don’t see a mathematical way that the Bills don’t have home field advantage come January. Now what they do with it is yet to be seen.

The new Chiefs: Eagles

The Eagles are winning in weird ways. Week 1 the other team’s best player can’t catch. Week 2, a hall of fame tight end drops a pass that they catch and then this past week they block 2 field goals. Along the way there is officiating controversy since they often false start on the tush push and people are getting pissy about it. Odd ways of winning, grinding out victories, and supposed “ref help”. Sure sounds like last year’s Chiefs to me. But they are still the champs and yet to get knocked off.

It’s already week 3. The season is already flying by. Is this the week someone finally beats the Eagles? Is this the week the Chiefs finally win a game? Which fan base has more fans at the Broncos @ Chargers game? How bad is Carson Wentz? Find out all that and more in this week’s Five for Friday!

Battle of the back up Quarterbacks: Bengals @ Vikings

Shockingly to no one, Joe Burrow is hurt…again. The offensive line is not good. So in steps Jake Browning. It’s not his first rodeo as he went 4-3 as a starter back in 2023. Of course the defense was a little more competitive back then and surely the offensive line wasn’t worse. But despite throwing 3 interceptions last week, he still led a comeback victory. The Bengals are 2-0 but it’s been a very shaky 2-0. Meanwhile the Vikings have a great team with a great coach. But they have a glaring issue at the Quarterback position. JJ McCarthy has played one really good quarter and 7 terrible quarters in 2 games. Now he is hurt I guess. But it is hard to think that a back up quarterback will be a step down. Enter Carson Wentz to prove me wrong. Wentz hasn’t been great since like 2018. He hasn’t been good since 2020 and he hasn’t started a meaningful game since 2021. But here he is. Playing for a great team and a great coach. I trust Jake Browning more than I trust Wentz. But I trust the rest of the Vikings way more than I do the rest of the Bengals. Plus the Vikings are at home.

Vikings 24 Bengals 20

Rematch of the last hard game the Eagles played: Rams @ Eagles

The Eagles squeaked by the Chiefs last week so we could call that a hard game, I guess. But they were in control most of the game thanks to a Travis Kelce drop. The Eagles sailed through the playoffs last year except for the game against the Rams. The Rams were able to match their physicality and are able to grind out games themselves. Matt Stafford is an experienced quarterback who can read defenses and make smart decisions. The Rams are a couple of bad plays from making the NFC championship. The Eagles on the other hand haven’t looked great through 2 weeks but have found ways to win and certainly have the talent to go 3-0. The other story here is the tush push that fell under heavy scrutiny when Tom Brady pointed out multiple false starts and illegal alignments on the play. If the GOAT says it, people listen. I think they will get a couple of penalties on that play this week. Both these teams are going to be in the hunt in the end but give me the Rams in an upset on the road.

Rams 27 Eagles 24

Battle of the preseason AFC West Champs: Broncos @ Chargers

All the talking heads were picking one of these two teams to win the AFC West. Right now they are all gloating saying the Chiefs are done. While I am not so sure about that, their bad start has certainly made things more interesting. The Chargers beat the Chiefs and then dominated a bad Raiders team. The Broncos beat a bad Titans team with a rookie quarterback starting for the first time and then lost to a Colts team no one saw coming because of an odd and silly penalty on a 60 yard field goal. While we can debate whether it should have been called or not, we should also be asking why the heck you are using the center for leverage on a 60 yard field goal to begin with. The great news for the Broncos is that this will basically be a home game for them. The Chargers may be good but they still don’t have any fans and Broncos fans tend to travel well. Bo Nix played better last week but still made a few crucial errors. Meanwhile Justin Herbert has been playing at an MVP level. I’m sure he will choke when it matters but week 3 isn’t that time. Give me the Chargers to pull off the sweep of AFC West opponents to start the season. Also, who made this schedule? I’ve never seen one team play all of their divisional opponents in a row to start a season.

Chargers 20 Broncos 12

Curtain Closing On Broadway?: Chiefs @ Giants

The Chiefs are 0-2 and have lost 3 in a row dating back to the Super Bowl. They haven’t looked especially great on either side of the ball. The Suspension to Rice and injury to Worthy have not helped things. But regardless, we cannot run the ball at all, Kelce keeps dropping touchdowns and Pat can’t hit wide open guys running deep. The defense performed better last week but that may have had more to do with the Eagles refusal to throw the ball down the field. We will find out if we fixed the secondary this week because we know Russ will chuck it down there. It would also be nice if the Chiefs could get pressure without blitzing everyone and if our quarterback wasn’t our leading rusher. There are lots of people that are calling it the end of the dynasty and that the Chiefs are done. Losing to the Giants would sure make that seem true. The Giants will be ready and excited to play at home for the first time hoping to throw the knock out punch. I started to even doubt myself. I thought maybe this is the curtain call on my beloved Chiefs. But then I thought of something last night, and I fell fast asleep. And that thought was this. The Giants suck. They didn’t score a td against the Commanders and lost to the Cowboys who aren’t good either. Also, Broadway is in New York and the Giants are in New Jersey.

Chiefs 31 Giants 17

Dirty D vs Bloody B: Lions @ Ravens

These are two pretty terrible towns. I mean there are some nice areas around both places and the stadium isn’t actually in Baltimore but these are some dangerous cities. They are also some dangerous offenses as both of these teams can put up some points. This one will be outside where Jared Goff is historically not as good. It’s hard to get a read on the Lions in general as they blew out the Bears who are terrible but couldn’t do anything against the Packers who are good. The Ravens beat themselves against the Bills and then took care of the Browns at home. If the Lions can keep it close, I like their chances because the Ravens can find a way to lose. But that pesky Lamar Jackson is hard to stop. This should be a fun, back and forth shoot out. I think the Lions are good but not great so give me the Ravens by a td.

Ravens 38 Lions 31

We are two weeks into fantasy football season and all my teams are 1-1. I still feel good about two of them but I think my family league team is in trouble. Many of you may be 2-0, 0-2 or 1-1 like me. It’s still early but here are some signs that your fantasy team probably sucks. And even if they don’t suck now, here are some signs to look out for.

10. More players landed on IR than scored points for you last week.

We’ve all had that team over the seasons that no matter what you do everyone keeps getting hurt. If your fantasy team resembles the 49ers you are probably in trouble.

9. You seem to play everyone on their best week.

I put up 140 points in one league and still lost by 20. A couple of years ago I was second in points but finished 9th. We don’t really have much control in fantasy football but sometimes you have no control.

8. Your number 1 receiver is AJ Brown.

AJ is a talented guy but they refuse to throw him the ball and when they do, they don’t throw it farther than 5 or 10 yards. He doesn’t even get to be apart of the tush push. Poor guy.

7. You drafted Joe Burrow and forgot he was made of glass.

Burrow is an awesome fantasy quarterback…when he plays. The problem is he only plays every other year.

6. All your running backs are handcuffs.

For those of you who don’t know the fantasy football lingo, a handcuff is when you draft or pick up a player who won’t score you a lot of fantasy points unless the starter gets hurt. The handcuff is you are prepared for this injury or prepared to take advantage of the injury with a solid player who doesn’t start. You typically want to have 2 or 3 good starting running backs and then maybe 1 or 2 handcuff running backs. Some examples of a good handcuff at running back are Zach Charbonnet, Treyvon Henderson, Trey Benson and Ollie Gordon. These also happen to be 4 of my 5 running backs in my family league.

5. You drafted too many rookies.

The saying goes, every year a rookie or two will win you a championship. You took this too serious and now have 10 rookies on your team. It is not going well.

4. You have multiple kickers.

If there is a kicker on your bench, this might not be the game for you.

3. You thought auto drafting continued with the waiver wire throughout the season.

Auto drafting is not a terrible strategy. The problem is that most auto drafters are also not active during the season. If you roll with the 15 or so players that the system told you to draft then you are likely not to have a good year. Joe Mixon and Justin Tucker are not going to help you win much this year.

2. You’re a homer but your home team stinks.

You just couldn’t turn down drafting that 3rd string running back or 4th receiver from your favorite team in the 8th round and you nabbed your teams kicker and defense in the 5th and 6th round. So now you have extra reasons to be upset because not only does your favorite team suck but so does your fantasy team.

1. It’s week 3 and you are just now realizing you are in a fantasy league.

You ignored the multiple texts and emails about the draft. Your commissioner asked for your payment via PayPal back in July and you are just now realizing that you are 0-2 and basically out $50 and your only goal now is to avoid the last place punishment.

Joking aside, I wish you all the best of luck in your leagues this year. Unless you play in my leagues then I hope your team is made up of injuries, handcuffs and homer picks.

2 weeks down, 16 to go. Here are the always serious and accurate Fifth-Down rankings going into week 3.

Our Coach is getting fired countdown: Dolphins

This team is a disaster. I have enjoyed having Mike McDaniel in my football life if nothing else for his press conferences. But it is obviously even he has given up after he dropped this quote after the game this week. “To win games you have to win the game, not lose the game, honestly. And that is how you lose the game.” I mean it’s like he isn’t even trying which I think at this point is accurate.

Rookie QB the least of their worries: Titans

Cam Ward has been far from awesome. But they also aren’t good at running with the ball or catching it or playing defense.

Not good but occasionally fun: Browns, Saints, Giants, Panthers, Bears and Jets

I have low expectations for all of these teams but I think that we are going to see some weeks where they get blown out and some occasions were they are competitive. But none of them are especially good.

Have issues that probably won’t get worked out: Raiders, Vikings, Cowboys and Steelers

Raiders are still gonna Raider. The Vikings don’t have a quarterback after all, the Cowboys can’t play defense and surprisingly the Steelers can’t play defense either.

Have issues that might get worked out: Patriots, Jaguars, Bengals and Seahawks

The Patriots are young but might get better. The Jags are competitive but have a Trevor Lawrence turnover problem. The Bengals can’t block and don’t have a quarterback. The Seahawks have a quarterback but it is Sam Darnold.

Have issues but will probably get them worked out: Chiefs and Texans

Both these teams are 0-2 so I can’t rank them any higher. But they have both lost to two good teams and both losses were close. I know the history of teams that started 0-2 is not good when it comes to making the playoffs but I am not giving up on these two teams yet. I think they still make the playoffs and win their divisions.

Might be good but I’m still skeptical: Cardinals, Colts, Falcons and 49ers

These 4 teams have all looked good at times but I need to see more before I am a believer. Plus it is only a matter of time before the rest of the 49ers get hurt.

Are good but not sure how good yet: Lions, Broncos, and Commanders

The Lions got blown out and then blew out a really bad team. The Broncos looked good on D in week 1 and Offense in week 2. One could assume they will probably put the two together at some point. The Commanders seem kind of shaky and Jayden Daniels is already banged up. Something seems a little off.

Real good…so far: Rams, Bucs and Chargers

All 3 teams have done great but…the Rams are a Matt Stafford injury away from being bad. The Bucs are running out of offensive lineman. And the Chargers are well…the Chargers so you figure they are going to screw this up at some point.

Super Bowl Contender until the games matter: Ravens

The Ravens are good, real good. Except when the games matter.

Actually Super Bowl Contenders: Packers and Bills

These two teams seem like the best teams in their conferences. But it is week 3, so who knows.

Still the false start champs: Eagles

Eagles are still real good and they are getting a “head start” on the new season. They aren’t afraid to cross the line to get a victory. They will push their way to victory even if it means breaking a few rules. I’m not making excuses for my Chiefs. The Eagles won the game. They are still the champs until they get beat.

I try to keep this blog and all my social media light and fun. Obviously this past week was tough in our country. There was another school shooting 13 miles from my house. Charlie Kirk was sadly murdered. Whether you agreed with him or not, free speech is important to our country and no one deserves to die for speaking their mind. And then we remembered 9/11. I was not in the mood to write funny things so it took me a few days to get here. But I also think laughter and thinking about meaningless things like football can be a healthy break from the tragedies of our world. If you aren’t ready for that, I understand but if you are, then read on as I present this week’s 6 for Saturday.

Battle of disappointing Cats: Jaguars @ Bengals

I am more of a dog person myself. If you have ever owned a cat, you know they are crazy. Most of them could care less about your existence and they can be staring at a wall and all of the sudden freak out and take off running. They can be rather disappointing pets. But that is not the cats I am talking about here. Back in the 2022 season, these cat teams were on the rise. The Jaguars one a playoff game and challenge the Chiefs in the second round. The Bengals went to the Super Bowl and had beaten the Chiefs 3 times in a row. But then they lost to the Chiefs in the AFC Championship game. Since then, the Bengals have not made it to the playoffs and have lost to the Chiefs 3 straight times. The Jaguars have been even worse and missed the playoffs both years as well and fired their coach. The Jags won their opening game against another disappointing cat team in the Panthers. The Bengals squeaked by an awful Browns team. Now these two teams with pretty boy quarterbacks face off in week 2. The Jags looked good but again they were playing the Panthers. The Bengals made a lot of changes to make sure they didn’t suck at the beginning of the season but still sucked in week 1. I don’t trust either of these teams at this point but give me the Jags since it is week 2 and the Bengals typically don’t start playing good ball until October.

Jaguars 24 Bengals 21

The Replacements: Browns @ the Former Browns (also known as the Ravens)

If you have been reading my blog over the past few years, you know I love to bring up the fact that the Ravens are actually the Browns and the current Browns are the expansion team. The Ravens were more than happy to give the Browns their old crappy history. But as of late, the Ravens look like the Browns I remember from the late 80s, a very good team that finds a way to rip defeat from the jaws of victory. This was evident this past week when they blew a big lead against the Bills. The Browns meanwhile had their own heartbreaking loss to the Bengals when their kicker missed an extra point and a field goal and lost by a point. The Browns are lead by their replacement quarterback, Shane Falco…I mean Joe Flacco. He’s been in the league for a while now and can still chuck it around the field. The Browns defense is pretty dang good and I think the Browns might not be quite as bad as I expected which doesn’t take a lot. But they are still the Browns and have a lot of self inflicted wounds. Meanwhile, the Ravens lost in heartbreaking fashion in week 1 last year and turned around and lost a terrible Raiders team at home in week 2. Will history repeat itself this week? Vegas doesn’t think so as it is the biggest spread of the week. I can’t see the Ravens losing this one, but I will laugh if they do. But if it is close, either of these teams could find a way to lose.

Ravens 31 Browns 17

Bo knows turnovers: Broncos @ Colts

Both these teams are 1-0 after the Broncos edged out the Titans lead by a rookie quarterback and the Colts blew out a bad Dolphins team. This will be a bigger challenge for both teams. The Colts led by Daniel Jones of all people looked awesome. The Colts d is solid and their offensive weapons are solid. They just need some pretty good play at the quarterback position. Danny Dimes led them to scores on every single drive last week. However, he faces a much bigger challenge this week against a very good Broncos defense. The Broncos D basically won the game as they shut down every attempt the Titans made to make a come back. However, Bo Nix did not look good. I expected much more from him to start season 2 but he made a lot of mistakes and forced balls where he didn’t need to and threw to the wrong people often. Will he bounce back this week? I predicted the Broncos would go undefeated in September so I am rolling with them but if Bo plays like he did last week, it will be tough for them to pull it off. But also don’t expect Daniel Jones to play as well as he did last week against this Broncos defense.

Broncos 23 Colts 16

Super Bowl Rematch…minus some guys: Eagles @ Chiefs

As a Chiefs fan, I am just trying to forget last season’s Super Bowl. Unfortunately this week that has been hard to do. To make matters worse, Rashee Rice is suspended and Xavier Worthy is hurt. However, I am more worried about the defense after Justin Herbert carved them up last week. The Eagles will be without one of their offensive lineman and their tight end, Dallas Goedert. That evens the playing field a little but the Eagles are still the better team. We are going to need Mahomes magic to pull this one off. If anyone can do it, it is Pat. He has literally never lost 3 games in a row and never started the season 0-2. I will be doing my part to try to help by busting out my Mahomes jersey that I only wear for special and big games. But I fear it won’t be enough. But don’t fret fellow Chiefs fans, I told you it was going to be a rough start to the year but things will get better. Just not this week.

Eagles 31 Chiefs 20

The future is bright game: Falcons @ Vikings

Both these teams have quarterbacks that the franchises have a lot of hope in. Michael Pennix played a heck of game last week and got the Falcons in position to win the game until their kicker missed the game winner. The coach is so upset about it that the kicker is now benched and they got a new one. JJ McCarthy played fairly awful for 3 quarters but then turned it on in the 4th and led the Vikings back to victory. You can tell his team and his coach, quarterback whisperer Kevin O’Connell believe in him. JJ’s wife also had a kid this week so he has had a busy few days. This should be a fun one. I like what the Falcons are building and I think they will have some success offensively. I’m interested to see if we will get a little more 4th quarter JJ this week and a little less of the JJ we saw for the first 3 quarters last week. Ultimately I’m going with the home team with the better defense to pull off a close victory.

Vikings 24 Falcons 20

Battle of the lack of fan bases: Chargers @ Raiders

The winner of this one will be a top the AFC West division. The Chargers can move to 2-0 in the division. It has to be some sort of oddity to start the season with 3 divisional opponents in the first 3 weeks. But if they can win all 3 they can take a strong hold on the division. The Raiders kicked off their season with a win against the Patriots but we don’t really know if the Patriots are any good. Typically the Raiders home games are filled with a bunch of fans from the other team. But luckily for the Raiders, the Chargers don’t have any fans. The Raiders don’t have a ton either but this should be a mostly home game for them. Unfortunately, I just don’t think the Raiders are actually that good. The Chargers impressed me last week and I think they will keep it rolling. I am sure the Chargers will fold at some point this season because you know…they are the Chargers but I think they will pull off the victory here.

Chargers 31 Raiders 21

Week 1 is in the books and now we move on to week 2. To get you ready for the week, here are Fifth-Down’s very official and technical rankings.

Dumpster Fire: Dolphins

Woof, they looked bad. I mean I was higher on the Colts coming in to the season than most people but when you can’t stop Daniel Jones from scoring one time and you have Achane, Hill and Waddle and only score 8 points, you got problems.

Suck a little less than I thought: Saints and Browns

Both of these teams put up more of a fight than I thought they would. Although this could just be because the teams they were playing aren’t that good either.

Suck more than I thought they would: Giants and Panthers

Both of these teams couldn’t do anything offensively and they weren’t playing the toughest defenses in the league either.

Not the start they were hoping for: Titans, Seahawks, Patriots, Texans and Bears

These teams had high hopes coming into the season but all fell short. The Titans couldn’t move the ball at all. Sam Darnold looked like Sam Darnold from 2022 instead of 2024. And the Patriots were competitive but also didn’t look great for most of the game. I’m sure the Texans will move up the list soon but they looked pretty awful scoring only 9 points yesterday. And finally the Bears gave up a 11 point lead in the fourth quarter to a QB making his first start on the road who had only thrown for 56 yards and a pick 6 in the first 3 quarters.

Happy they won a game….any game: Raiders, Cardinals, Bengals, Colts, Jags

The Raiders and Cardinals have been perennial losers so they are just happy to beat anyone. The Bengals never win in September and almost always lose the first game. They did things differently this preseason to try and get off to a fast start but it didn’t seem to help as they needed to get bailed out by just some awful kicking by the Browns kicker. The Colts should be happy anytime they win a game with Daniel Jones at quarterback. And the Jags have been a disaster for a while but looked like a functional football team again.

Good looking losers: Cowboys, Jets and Falcons

Dallas looked way better than I thought they would. Sure they were helped out by the best Eagles defensive player getting kicked out for spitting but still. If Cedee Lamb had put on some new gloves they might have won that game. The Jets tore it up offensively but just couldn’t stop some old guy from slinging it around. And the Falcons had a chance to tie to send the game to over time and got in position but the kicker just missed the kick. But certainly all of these teams enter into next week with some hope.

Bad looking winners: Broncos, Rams, 49ers

All 3 looked good defensively but offensively they were up and down at best. Bo Nix and Brock Purdy didn’t look great. Bo especially looked pretty shaky. Stafford and the Rams did just enough which is fine. A win is a win and stuff. I think all 3 will be fine but they still got work to do.

Old, Bitter man gets revenge: Steelers

While the defense looked shaky, old man Rodgers looked great going 22 for 30 for 244 yards and 4 touchdowns. Aaron after the game said he was happy to beat anyone associated with the Jets. I guess they don’t teach you not to be petty in that cave.

Lost but they’ll be fine: Lions and Chiefs

The Chiefs looked better than the Lions but both teams have some defensive issues. I suspect the Lions will bounce back offensively this week but I think both teams are in for a rough few weeks. They have the culture and coaching to figure it out and be competitive when it matters most though.

A win is a win…even against the Giants: Commanders

The Commanders looked fine. They weren’t spectacular but they didn’t have to be. It’s encouraging that the defense only gave up 6 points but Russ was playing quarterback for the opposing team so hard to read too much into it.

I mean…: Ravens

Only the Ravens could lose that game. I saw this interesting fact on twitter last night. Teams that score 40 or more points and rush for 235 yards or more were 277-0 in the history of the NFL. They are now 277-1.

Cardiac kids: Bucs, Bills and Vikings

These teams had to come back to win. The Bucs scored the winning td with less than a minute to go but then went on to miss the extra point to keep a 3 point game. They needed the Falcons to miss a fg to win. The Bills needed a fg as time expired to complete their insane comeback. Both games were fun to watch…unless you are Falcons or Ravens fan. And finally the Vikings. It took them a while to get going but at this point I think Kevin O’Connell could have me play quarterback and win some games.

Super Bowl Pretenders: Chargers and Packers

These two teams looked great beating teams that many thought would be in the hunt for a championship. I’m not saying they aren’t both good and actual contenders, but they are going to be so massively hyped this week that we should probably just put the brakes on a little and see where they are in a few weeks.

Still the Champs: Eagles

The Eagles took the Cowboys best shots and survived. They are still the team to beat. Either that or some Philly fans threatened Cedee Lamb’s life. My guess is a little of both.

Well, I had high hopes to get Five for Friday done but alas, my job and real life got in the way. Plus I had to watch my Chiefs lose in a foreign country while our second best receiver got hurt and is out indefinitely. You remember that time that Mahomes had all his weapons available at the same time? Me neither. But in good news for you, now you get predictions for six games instead of 5. Let’s do this.

Breaking up is hard to do: Steelers @ Jets

While I don’t think this will be an enjoyable game to watch, it is an interesting storyline with the teams trading quarterbacks. Last year, Aaron Rodgers was the great hope that didn’t come through in New York…well really New Jersey. Meanwhile, Justin Fields went 4-2 in 6 starts for the Steelers and his reward was getting benched. Now Fields is in New Jersey and Aaron is in Pittsburgh. All reports say that Fields still can’t throw but the team is less of a disaster overall. And in Pitt, it seems that if anyone can deal with Rodgers shenanigans it would be Mike Tomlin who is hell bent on winning 9-10 games for the next 20 years. I expect lots of throws to DK Metcalf by Rodgers as he typically only throws to one guy and the Steelers set him up for success by literally not giving him anyone else to throw to. And I expect Fields to scramble a lot when he probably shouldn’t scramble. While the game is in New Jersey, I still put my money on the Steelers in this one. Rodgers does enough along with a good Steelers defense and their kicker coming through with a game winner.

Steelers 20 Jets 17

Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane: Raiders @ Patriots

These two teams have been struggling. For the Patriots, the struggle has been since Tom Brady left. For the Raiders the struggle has been since 1984. But they now both have new hope with new coaches and new quarterbacks. Pete Carroll who hasn’t not won 10 games in forever (except he has) and Geno Smith join the Raiders. Meanwhile, Mike Vrabel joins second year Drake Maye in New England. The Raiders were terrible on both sides of the ball last year despite having the “recipe to beat the Chiefs” last year. They didn’t have the recipe to beat anyone and were terrible. But now they have Carroll and Geno and a great rookie Jeanty at running back. They can’t be worse so they should be better. Meanwhile, Vrablel brought Josh McDaniels back to be the offensive coordinator of the Patriots after a couple dumpster fire attempts as a head coach. It should be a fun and entertaining game but I trust Vrable and McDaniels to get their crap together sooner than whatever the Raiders are trying to do. I mean Armani Cooper just retired so he didn’t have to play for the Raiders so that should tell you everything you need to know. Plus, Raiders gonna raider.

Patriots 30 Raiders 20

Bo knows beating bad teams: Titans @ Broncos

Last year, rookie quarterbacks took the league by storm. Jayden Daniels lead his team to the NFC Championship and Bo Nix lead his team to the playoffs after beating a lot of bad teams and the Bucs. And then they lost to the Bills 31-7. But all the rookie quarterbacks struggled in game 1 last year. And the Broncos were great at beating bad teams. The Titans are a bad team with a rookie quarterback starting. Joking aside, I do think the Broncos will be good this year. And their defense was already great and somehow got better at least on paper. Bo is good and even better against subpar defenses which I am pretty sure the Titans are. I like Cam Ward and I think he will be good but even Jayden struggled in week 1 against an average Bucs D. So I do not like Cam’s chances against a top 5 defense like the Broncos on the road. I’m just hoping he completes enough passes to my boy Calvin Ridley to make him fantasy relevant since I have him on all three of my teams.

Broncos 34 Titans 17

What’s Love got to do with it? Lions @ Packers

This should be a great game between two great teams. Oddly enough the Lions have owned the Packers lately. Detroit owning anything besides high crime levels and rap battles definitely feels odd but yet here they are. The Packers were already a team some where high on and then they traded for Micah Parsons to really make some noise. In case you didn’t know, Micah is not great against the run but the Packers have sucked in pass rush for a while so I have heard he is pretty handy at that. The Lions have all their players back but lost both coordinators so that is their challenge. This game is at Lambeau and Jared Goff is not as good outside. He is much better inside except for key moments like the divisional round and the Super Bowl. But hey, we can’t all be perfect. Even though his season didn’t end great on the field he did marry and impregnate a model so he has that going for him…which is nice. I think both these teams are going to be great and Super Bowl contenders and this should be a fun game but early on, I trust the Lions and their massive amount of weapons in this one. I get it is a new coordinator but how hard is it to call plays to get the ball in the hands of Gibbs, St. Brown, Williams and Laporta. I still believe the Packers win the division but I think the Lions win game one.

Lions 31 packers 27

Battle of teams who can’t beat the Chiefs when it matters: Ravens @ Bills

The first Sunday night football game is a doozy. The divisional round opponents from last year face off right away after Mark Andrews dropped a key two point conversion last year. The Ravens are arguably the most talented team in the league and winners of the media award for “best roster” every year. They have Lamar who statistically should basically be the MVP every year since it is basically a QB award now based upon only the regular season. Meanwhile, Josh Allen had one of his worst statistical seasons of his career last year and won MVP because, you know…he hadn’t won yet and it was his turn. Both teams are really good and I think they could easily meet again in the playoffs. I think Josh is the better quarterback but Lamar has the better team. Since it is a regular season game, I’ll take the Ravens in this one. Plus, I have Lamar in one of my fantasy leagues and need him to not suck.

Ravens 31 Bills 24

Sophomore sensation or slump? Vikings @ Bears

In the Monday night battle, we have two divisional rivals with sophomore quarterbacks trying to change the path of their stories. JJ McCarthy missed all of last year due to an injury and Caleb Williams wished he missed more of last year due to playing for a coach who didn’t know what a timeout was. JJ has a great defense, great established weapons and a coach that has proven they can be competitive with just about any quarterback. Meanwhile, Caleb has a new head coach, a new offensive line and weapons that are supposed to be good. I find Ben Johnson nerdy and annoying. I find Caleb overrated. I don’t have any feelings about JJ McCarthy although I am no fan of Michigan. I do love Kevin O’Connell although he is going to have to win a playoff game at some point to stay relevant. But considering that the Chiefs defense who we just saw got worked on Friday confused Caleb in a preseason game, I’m confident that Brian Flores and the Vikings D can frustrate Caleb in this one. I sort of feel like it is only a matter of time before Ben Johnson moves on from Caleb for Tyler Bagent.

Vikings 27 Bears 17