It’s time for another 5 for Friday when I give you my thoughts and predictions on 5 games happening this week. Let’s get started.

The Birthday boy vs Sunshine

Chiefs @ Jaguars

Let’s kick it off with my favorite team. Chris Jones is back, Kelce is practicing (although limitedly) and Patrick is pissed off. All is right with the world. Heck the game is even going to be on Patrick’s Birthday. The problem is they are facing a very good Jaguars team. Among amazing Patrick stats is that the team is 13-3 following a loss with him. But I really like this Jags team. They have a lot of talent. I was thinking this would be a game where our offense played better but our D sucked and we lost something like 34-31. Skip Bayless would still somehow blame Mahomes, everyone would talk about how the Chiefs are done and the dynasty was over before it started, yada, yada, yada. And then we would win 6 in a row and be 6-2 at the bye. But then I woke up this morning and put on my Chiefs socks and since it will be Pat’s b-day, I’m going Chiefs in this one.

Chiefs 31 Jaguars 27

The running back who plays quarterback vs Macaulay Culkin

Ravens @ Bengals

The Ravens new passing attack didn’t look great in week 1 against the Texans. Meanwhile, home alone and the gang were flat out terrible against the Browns in the rain. Tee Higgins caught zero balls on 8 targets. Only 2 of those targets were even in his area code. Burrow got paid and then decided he didn’t need to play anymore on his way to passing for a whopping 82 yards. On the Ravens side, starters are already getting hurt. Though to be fair, usually their running backs have season ending injuries before the season even starts as opposed to week 1. So I call this progress! They are also down a couple of linemen but that is par for the course for them.

The Ravens always play the Bengals tough and the Bengals almost always start 0-2. The Bengals almost lost to these guys in the playoffs last year when Tyler Huntley was playing QB. If this was week 12 instead of week 2 I’d be all in on the Bengals but this is the “bengals suck and the ravens are going to win the super bowl” part of the season. Burrow plays better but so does Lamar. Ravens for the win.

Ravens 30 Bengals 24

The QB I don’t trust vs the QB I don’t trust

Seahawks @ Lions

Are the Seahawks that bad? Are the Lions that good? The Lions beat the defending champs with the help of some dropped passes and the inability to get a yard. The Seahawks got demolished by a Cooper Kuppless Rams team. The Lions seemed to have gotten better on defense although they got help from the Chiefs receivers. The offense didn’t always look great but they have some good potential there. Meanwhile, the Seahawks were awful. Was 2022 Geno a fake? Or will he bounce back and put on a strong performance. This is the battle of quarterbacks who seem like nice guys that I have zero trust in playing well consistently. But since it is in a dome I’ll go with Goff and the Lions.

Lions 31 Seahawks 20

A healthy team??? vs what’s left of the Rams

49ers @ Rams

The 49ers looked like the best team in the league on Sunday. The Rams looked like a functional football team which is better than I thought they would. Who needs a Cooper when you have a Puka? And no I am not talking about an imaginary rabbit. (bonus points for anyone who gets that movie reference). I’m talking about Puka Nacua. Of course because it is the Rams he is hurt now and questionable for Sunday. The 49ers on the other hand are healthy. Don’t say it too loud or someone on their team might tear a ligament. They have a ton of weapons and Brock Purdy seems solid enough to use them that I picked him up on one of my fantasy teams. Brock hasn’t played in a regular season game and not thrown two touchdowns. Since I picked him up in fantasy, I am sure that streak will immediately end. The Rams hang tough in this one but the 49ers are the better team. Purdy only throws one touchdown but they still get the victory. But they are playing in LA so look for an important player or two to get hurt and be out for the season.

49ers 28 Rams 20

Elves vs the best team in preseason

Browns @ Steelers

We get our first unnecessary Monday night double header this week. I guess that is a win for the East Coast people who can’t stay up late enough to watch the whole game. Now they can watch the early game while I am still at work. The second game in the night cap is the elves…I mean Browns vs the Steelers. Not to bring up the Bengals again but Jamar Chase is something else. He called them elves earlier in the week and then they got their butt’s kicked. He said he was mad that they lost to elves after he called them elves. When asked about the Browns players response to his elves comments he said they were just trying to get attention. Dude, your whole thing is about getting attention. Anyway, the Browns are 1-0 and the Steelers are 0-1. After being preseason darlings and scoring on every drive that the first team played in, the Steelers were just terrible on Sunday. Now they host massage boy and the Browns. Are the Steelers really as bad as they looked last Sunday? Are the Browns actually good? Who will Watson make uncomfortable? There are so many questions. The Steelers hardly ever lose to the Browns and I got to imagine the offense has to be at least a little better this week. George Pickens makes a couple of crazy catches including one to seal the game.

Steelers 20 Browns 13

Fifth-Down Prediction Record: 3-2

Week 1 of the NFL is in the books and according media pundits 16 teams are incredible and 16 are terrible. We keep it a little more real here at Fifth-Down and aren’t ready to write off the 16 losing teams just yet or crown the 16 winning teams. So here are this week’s rankings.

Still a Dumpster Fire but a fire with fight:

The Cardinals are terrible but the players do seem to care…at least for now. We will see what happens after they drop a few more games.

Still Suck:

Colts, Texans, Panthers, Bears.

None of these teams did anything to instill any confidence in them for this season. Colts and Panthers saw some good things from their rookie quarterbacks but not good enough to have a good year. Texans are still awful and Fields looked just as bad throwing as he always did.

Still Suck…but maybe suck a little less:

Broncos, Raiders, Commanders, Patriots

I know two of these teams won but it’s not like they dominated. The Commanders barely beat a team that is literally trying to lose and the Raiders and Broncos both had 10 penalties. The Raiders won by 1 point and the Broncos missed an extra point. Good call on dumping McManus. Patriots kept it interesting but I’m not buying it long term.

Woof…that was bad:

Giants, Seahawks, Steelers

These 3 teams had high hopes entering the season. It did not start well.

Boringly Bad:

Titans

I think Ryan Tannehill is out actually trying to lose his job.

Are going to win 9 games and also win their division:

Falcons and/or Saints

Neither looked great but 1 of them is likely going to win the South

Scrappy in week 1 but unsustainable:

Bucs and Rams

The Rams still have no depth and will get exposed next week. No team with Baker can sustain success.

Team who won, but their season is still over:

Jets

Aaron Rodgers got hurt on the Jets 4th offensive play. Enter Zach Wilson who is a complete disaster and only threw a td due to a miraculous catch by Garrett Wilson. And the Jets can’t pass block to save their lives. They are done.

Already finding ways to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory:

Chargers and Vikings

They are who we thought they were.

Team who proved me right:

I said the Packers wouldn’t suck. Hey, its only one week so I am not getting overly excited but everyone who wrote off the Packers might want to rethink it.

Team who proved me wrong:

Lions. They are a solid team. Granted if the Chiefs had anyone who would have decided to catch the ball in the second half, they would have lost. But they were in it the whole game and their rookies really stepped up. I’m still not sold on Jared Goff but I think the Lions will be in it most of the year.

Team that had a happy ending on Sunday:

Browns

Too soon?

Team that is going to be wrongly overhyped this week:

Cowboys D is solid but Dak is still suspect.

Team that will be good if their QB doesn’t turn the ball over at record pace:

Bills

Josh Allen might have had money on the Jets last night.

Team that is already on its way to running out of running backs:

Ravens

My conversation with my sister during our fantasy draft this year.

Ruth “I’m going to draft this Dobbins person, what do you think?”

Jeff “He is injury prone. He gets hurt every year.”

Ruth “Well maybe he is due to not get hurt this year.”

Ruth was wrong.

Team that is going to be really fun to watch if their QB stays alive:

Dolphins

I’m literally cheering each week for Tua’s safety.

Other team that is on track to prove me right:

Jaguars

I’ve been high on them since the middle of last year. They didn’t look dominant but they looked good enough and have a lot of weapons.

Teams that looked bad offensively but will play in the AFC Championship:

Chiefs and Bengals

Chiefs receivers couldn’t have caught Covid in 2020 the way they played last week. But Mahomes is still the man, Jones and Kelce will be back and there is no way the receivers can have as many drops as last week. The Bengals looked awful in the rain in Cleveland. But they always look bad against Cleveland and they always look bad at the beginning of the year. They will be fine and my money is these two will meet in Arrowhead twice this year.

NFC Champ potential:

Eagles and 49ers

The Eagles didn’t play especially well and still won. The 49ers played especially well and won.

My money is on the same 4 teams still being the 4 best teams at the end of the season.

Football is back!!! The season didn’t exactly start the way I had hoped. Apparently Mahomes now has to throw the ball to himself to be successful. I really blame dumb Nick Wright as he predicted that we would go 20-0. In 2019, when Pat came back from an injury he said we wouldn’t lose another game. We then immediately lost the next game. Hopefully he learns his lesson and shuts his mouth but probably not since he wants to become the next Skip Bayless. Anyway along with football comes 5 for Friday when I discuss my thoughts on 5 games and make predictions on the winners. This week is a great first week with many compelling match ups. Let’s dive in.

Battle of the Quarterbacks who might be good: 49ers at Steelers

Brock Purdy looked like a perfect fit for the 49ers offense before getting hurt last year in the NFC championship game. The question is can he keep it going. He did not look as sharp in the playoffs when the teams got better and the games got tighter. Can he execute the Shanahan offense on the same level? And more importantly…can he stay healthy in the cursed organization that is the 49ers. The last thing anyone wants to see if the 49ers role out Sam Darnold. On the other side, Kenny Pickett also got hot the second half of last year although not to the level Steelers fans would lead you to believe. But he looked good in preseason but again…it is preseason. These two quarterbacks will face arguably the best defense that either of them have faced. These are also two teams I am not terribly fond of. I’m not sure who to cheer for in this one. Both fan bases can be annoying and I don’t really like either coach that much. But honestly the real question isn’t who wins but instead which 49er gets hurt.

49ers 24 Steelers 20

The guy the media Loves vs Jordan Love: Packers at Bears

According to the media and fans on the internet, the Packers shouldn’t even bother playing this year. Jordan Love who has played like 6 quarters of NFL football is the worst quarterback in the league. Meanwhile, Justin Fields is amazing despite going 5-20 as a starter and throwing for an average 149 yards per game last year. But hey, he rushed for a thousand yards last year so he is going to be great…in fantasy football…until he gets hurt. The excuse has been that he didn’t have any weapons, etc. Meanwhile, Love won’t get that excuse blessed upon him even though he will likely be missing his receiver number 1 and 2 since Watson and Doubs are both on the injury report with hamstring issues. Fields wins in fantasy but Love rises above it all to win the game. But he knows beating Chicago isn’t a big deal so he doesn’t make a big deal about owning them.

Packers 27 Bears 20

The team my wife loves against the team we both hate: Raiders @ Broncos

It would be easier to cheer for the Broncos if the Chiefs had won last night. Now if they win, I will have to hear from Danielle’s family about how their team is in first place for at least a week. The Raiders in the meantime are still enemy number 1 despite being terrible for the better part of the past 2 decades. It is hard to know what you are going to get from either of these teams. I am not a believer in Russ or Jimmy G. The Broncos are dealing with some injuries and the Raiders are dealing with some guys who have personal issues which is code for they don’t want to play for Josh McDaniels. These are two pretty even teams which leads me to typically go with the quarterback. But since this is a coin flip, I have to go with the coach. Josh McDaniels is arguably the worst NFL coach in my life time. Sean Payton is not. The kicker they just traded for hits the game winner. Happy Wife, Happy Life.

Broncos 19 Raiders 16

The battle for disappointment: Dolphins @ Chargers

These two teams have been finding ways to lose forever. Now they get to play each other and barring a tie, at least one of them will start their fan base off with a hope filled win that will lead to disappointment later instead of right away. Normally, traveling across the country to play on the road is a challenge. But I am confident there will be more Dolphin fans there than Chargers fans. I personally will be cheering that Tua doesn’t get concussed. I am sure the karate he worked on in the offseason will help him avoid that. These teams both have a lot of talent on both sides of the ball. The Dolphins added Vic Fangio to their staff to lead the defense. They also have the funniest and quirkiest head coach. The Chargers added Kellen Moore who looks like he is 12 to lead the offense even though last year the defense was the problem. Staley is a hot mess of a head coach who will find a way to lose this close game to the joy of the raucous Dolphin crowd in the stadium. Tua karate chops his way to victory.

Dolphins 31 Chargers 27

The Jets host the team from New York: Bills @ Jets

The Bills will leave New York to visit the New York Jets and the most hyped team in the NFL. Aaron Rodgers emerged from darkness to go to…New Jersey. He is happy, committed and even practiced. The Bills meanwhile have already been written off because the media no longer finds them interesting. The Jets O-Line has issues but the Bills are without Von Miller. Hard Knocks will be on the scene to record the latest episode. The Bills will try to play spoiler. You got the guy who openly does drugs vs the guy on the madden cover. It’s hard to predict what the heck the Jets will do in this one. But despite the media’s best efforts, we all know the Bills are a really good football team. So I’ll roll with the known commodity in this one. Bills get the W and Rodgers sings the Sound of Silence. “Hello, Darkness, my old friend”.

Bills 35 Jets 24

My favorite season is upon us! The NFL Season! And with that comes my weekly rankings and reactions. There is nothing to react to you yet…but I will conclude this post with my playoff predictions. Let’s jump into the first rankings of the year that go from worst to first (sort of).

Dumpster Fire: Arizona Cardinals

Already Eliminated from the playoffs: Colts and Texans

Doomed as long as Josh McDaniels is there coach: Raiders

Would Already be Eliminated from the playoffs if they didn’t play in the worst division in the league: Panthers and Buccaneers

Only not already eliminated from the playoffs because someone has to win their sorry division: Saints and Falcons

One bad Cooper Kupp hamstring away from already being eliminated from the Playoffs: Rams

Overhyped for no logical reason: Bears

Looking for a way to win by cheating while not having the greatest QB of all time: Patriots

Will no longer be a total embarrassment but still not good: Broncos and whatever they are calling the team in DC these days.

Boring but will probably be competitive: Titans and Giants

Set up to crush their fans hopes once again: Vikings, Dolphins, Lions, Browns

Set up to crush their fan’s hope once again: Chargers

Ready to overachieve and make me look real smart: Seahawks, Steelers, Packers

Super Bowl contenders that will probably have a bunch of injuries that ruin their chances: 49ers and Ravens

Overhyped team that will fail in the playoffs…again: Cowboys

Underhyped team that will fail in the playoffs…again: Bills

Overhyped team I can’t wait to actually watch play: Jets

Underhyped team I can’t wait to actually watch play: Jaguars

Teams almost as good but doesn’t have Andy Reid and Patrick Mahomes: Bengals and Eagles

Team that has Andy Reid and Patrick Mahomes: How about them Chiiiiiiiiiefs!

Playoff Predictions

NFC:

1. 49ers
2. Eagles
3. Packers
4. Saints
5. Cowboys
6. Seahawks
7. Vikings

Round 1: Eagles over Vikings, Saints over Cowboys, Seahawks over Packers

Round 2: 49ers over Seahawks, Eagles over Saints

Championship: 49ers over Eagles

AFC:

1. Chiefs
2. Jaguars
3. Bills
4. Bengals
5. Jets
6. Steelers
7. Ravens

Round 1: Jaguars over Ravens, Bills over Steelers, Jets over Bengals

Round 2: Chiefs over Jets, Bills over Jaguars

Championship: Chiefs over Bills

Super Bowl: Chiefs over 49ers

Chiefs become first team to win back to back in almost 20 years and solidify themselves as a dynasty!

Good luck to your team no matter where they are ranked. Let’s get the season started! Go Chiefs! And be on the look out for the first 5 for Friday tomorrow!

We have worked our way across the NFL Country from the East to the South to the North and we conclude with the Wild West.

NFC West

1st Place: San Francisco 49ers

The 49ers have arguably the best overall roster in the NFL. Both top West teams have a disgruntled defensive player waiting to get paid. But beyond that, this roster is solid. There biggest position issue has been QB. They traded up all the way to pick 3 a couple of years ago to solve this problem but instead found a solution in round 7 last year. I don’t think we have seen enough to know if Brock Purdy really is the solution. But I have seen enough that he is at least as good as Jimmy G, and much cheaper. The biggest struggle the 49ers will have is the fact that they may be the most injury prone team in the history of the league. I don’t know who their trainers are but they should get some new ones. They have a lot of guys who get hurt a lot. Deebo, McCaffrey, Kittle, Mitchell, the list goes on. Purdy got hurt last year too. But if half of them stay healthy, they should win the division.

Reason the win the West: They have the best team in the division and maybe in the league.

Reason they won’t win the West: They do what they normally do and everyone gets hurt and they run out of guys.

Fantasy Players to Draft: I have CMC ranked #2 on my board only behind Jefferson. If he gets hurt it is a bummer. But if he doesn’t, you will be real happy you drafted him. I am higher on Kittle than normal because Purdy seems to really like to throw him the ball. I am still not super high because it is only a matter of time before Kittle gets hurt and in fact he might already miss the first game. Deebo will score some points for you but also will get hurt. Aiyuk is a nice pick up especially where he is getting drafted. Drafting Mitchell late makes sense to me because if CMC gets hurt he will be the guy. Purdy is a decent pick up late as a back up if you don’t like your starting QB.

Predicted Record: 13-4

2nd Place: Seattle Seahawks

Everyone seems to think that Seattle is either going to win the division or miss the playoffs. I’m in between. Now they could certainly win the division based upon a bunch of 49ers getting hurt. But in order to beat the healthy 49ers their defense and Geno would have to take a pretty big leap forward. They are a solid team, though with solid weapons and good coaching. I think they are a sure fire playoff team and 4 or 5 49er injuries from winning the West. And if there defense improves you may not want to play them in the playoffs.

Reason they will win the West: Geno improves and the 49ers do 49er things and run out of players.

Reason they won’t win the West: Pete Carroll chokes on his gum as the Seahawks choke away the season.

Fantasy Players to draft: Metcalf and Lockett are no brainers. Lockett gets a thousand yards and 8 touchdowns every year. The rookie kid is hurt so he could be good but won’t have an early impact. Kenneth Walker was very good last year and the new kid Charbonnet is a good pick up in the later rounds. He has real upside and if Walker gets hurt, he will quickly become the guy. Geno Smith isn’t a terrible pick up in late rounds if you wait on QB.

Predicted Record: 11-6

3rd Place: Los Angeles Rams

The Rams went all in on the Super Bowl a couple of years ago. The result one super bowl ring and one disaster of a team. They have a couple great players in Aaron Donald and Cooper Kupp. And then a lot of not so good players. They have no depth. Now Matt Stafford’s wife has said he can’t connect with his teammates. It’s always a best practice for your spouse not to talk about your job on the radio. Of course most spouses don’t face this predicament. Typically Steve from logistics wife doesn’t get interviewed on Sirius. Anyhoo, it doesn’t sound like things are going great over there. They do have Stetson Bennett as their back up. He and Stafford both went to Georgia and are only a couple of years apart in age so Matt should be able to connect to him.

Reason they will win the West: Donald has 42 sacks and Stafford throws for 3,000 yards just to Cooper Kupp overcoming the fact that the rest of the team sucks.

Reason they won’t win the West: Matt Stafford in attempt to connect with his new, young teammates gets sucked into the never ending world of social media and online gaming and we don’t hear from him the rest of the season.

Fantasy Players to draft: Kupp although he has some sort of hamstring issue. Cam Akers has high upside but often finds himself in the doghouse for some reason. That is about it. You can pick up their defense the two weeks they are playing the Cardinals.

Predicted record: 6-11

4th Place: Arizona Cardinals

The Cardinals were not good last year but they are going all in this year to be as terrible as possible. They hired an inexperienced coach. Kyler Murray is out at least 4 games maybe longer. They dumped Colt McCoy and will likely start Josh Dobbs this week who has been on the team about 10 days. Their defense isn’t good. Their offense is worse. I think it is incredibly hard to go 0-17…but they just might be able to pull it off.

Reason they will win the West: Hell freezes over

Reason they won’t win the West: They are trying to top the Texans for worst run organization.

Fantasy Players to draft: James Connor and Hollywood Brown because as bad as they are, someone has to get the rock.

Predicted record: 2-15 (like I said, it is real hard to go defeated)

AFC West

1st Place: Kansas City Chiefs

No surprise here. I might be accused of being a homer but the Chiefs have won the division every year from 2016 to the present. Mahomes has never lost a road divisional game. They had the best record in the AFC last year, one year after trading arguably their best offensive weapon. They have the best quarterback, tight end and coach in the league. The defense isn’t great but also very young and could be better than last year. They would certainly be better with Chris Jones on the roster but they can win the division without him. I don’t think they can win it all without him but he said he would be back by week 8. That’s about the same time the new guy comes off suspension. So lets say we go 5-2 in the first 7 and then those two show up. We will be in great shape to make another run.

Reason they will win the West: Patrick Freaking Mahomes!

Reason they won’t win the West: Mahomes gets hurt and Andy gets sick and misses games.

Fantasy Players to draft: Mahomes obviously. Kelce will go early as well. People will argue that Kittle or whoever is a better tight end because they block better or whatever. There is no debate when it comes to fantasy. It is Kelce and then everyone else. Pacheco is a good pick up and McKinnon is streaky but a great guy to have on your bench. I don’t have enough confidence in any of the receivers to draft any of them before the 12th or 13th round.

Predicted Record: 14-3

2nd Place: Los Angeles Chargers

The Chargers have talent and should be good but they always find a way to lose. Their coach seems over his head. Herbert is very talented but doesn’t seem to be all that clutch. People want to blame their defense for their collapse in the playoff game last year, and the should shoulder much of the blame. But Herbert led the team to a whopping 3 points in the second half and missed several opportunities in the first half. The Chargers also like to get hurt a lot. Their stadium is where acls go to die. So based upon them choking a lot and getting injured a lot, they should be just good enough to finish second and either just get in or just miss the playoffs.

Reason they will win the West: Mahomes gets hurt and the other two teams suck so they win by default.

Reason they won’t win the West: They are the Chargers and are the kings of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

Fantasy Players to draft: They got a lot of them. Herbert, Ekeler, Keenan Allen (although I refuse to draft him because I hate him), Mike Williams, the rookie kid from TCU. The list goes on.

Predicted record: 10-7

3rd Place: Denver Broncos

The Broncos should be a functioning football team today which would certainly be an improvement. Sean Payton can coach and if nothing else is an adult so that should be a good starting point. For whatever the reason, their receivers can’t stay healthy. And to be honest, they aren’t very good when they are in the game. I still don’t think Russ is very good. I saw a decline in him the last couple of years he was in Seattle. The o-line should be better and their running backs are good. I think that they are at least a year away from the playoffs maybe more depending if Russ gets back to form. But winning 7-9 games is reasonable based upon their schedule. That should be enough to make my wife less miserable. And I think the Broncos beat the Chiefs in Denver breaking the 15 game losing streak and Mahomes perfect record in the division on the road. Just kidding, the donkeys find a way to lose once again.

Reason they will win the West: Mahomes gets hurt and the Chargers do Charger things.

Reason they won’t win the West: Russ is still Russ. Let’s Ride!

Fantasy players to draft: The running backs. That’s it. I’m not touching this passing game until I see it in action.

Predicted Record: 7-10

4th Place: Las Vegas Raiders

The Raiders broke a 20 year streak of missing the playoffs a couple of years ago. So how do you ruin a good thing? You hire Josh McDaniels. In about 18 months he made this team significantly worse. Jimmy G is not better than Derek Carr. And he also gets hurt pretty much every year. Now players are literally stating they don’t want to play for McDaniels. Josh seems like he is competing for worst head coach in NFL history. After his disaster of a job in Denver he is off to the races to make this round even worse. The best part is the Raiders have one of the smallest owner groups with the least amount of money in the league. They are already paying several other coaches who they fired and it is rumored they won’t fire McDaniels because they can’t afford to hire the next guy. But I am sure Tom Brady’s few bucks will save they day. Unless he bought in with Bitcoin.

Reason they will win the West: Mahomes gets hurt, the Chargers do Charger things, Sean Payton let’s Russ cook.

Reason they won’t win the West: Raiders gonna raider

Fantasy Players to Draft: Davante Adams and Josh Jacobs. That’s pretty much it.

Predicted Record: 5-11

Tune in tomorrow for the first league rankings of the year! Then you will also get a Five for Friday on Friday. Fifth-Down will be back in full effect for the NFL season.

After kicking things off with the East and then heading South, we now head up North to give you a breakdown of both NFC and AFC divisions. This has the makings of two very competitive divisions with perhaps no terrible teams. Here is a breakdown of who wins what and why, fantasy football tips, and a predicted record for each team and more.

NFC North

1st Place: Green Bay Packers

This is perhaps my boldest pick so far. I know that everyone in the media and most fans are down on the Packers. They think since Rodgers led them to a 8-9 record last year that they are obviously going to be worse this year. The web warriors on social media are quick to jump on anyone who thinks the Pack won’t be terrible this year. Meanwhile, the Lions and Bears are the social media darlings. For some reason, the Lions finally having a winning season catapults them to the top of the division and the Bears are a hot pick for some reason even though they won 3 games last year. The Vikings won the division last year so someone has to suck and everyone is assuming that it will be the Packers. There is lots of criticism of Jordan Love but the guy has played like 6 NFL quarters. He looked good when he came in last year. So why is this team supposed to be so bad? Look, they are young, I’ll give you that and this pick could blow up in my face. But maybe Jordan Love doesn’t suck. Maybe not having any pressure will free this team up to play well. Maybe the cloud that was Aaron Rodgers being lifted is exactly what this team needed. It is officially Matt LaFleur’s team now. If you don’t believe in him, then sure they will suck. But I think it is going to free him up to call the game he wants to call, not the game he has to call to keep grumpy pants happy. Also, their schedule is extremely easy.

Reason they will win the North: The cloud of Rodgers has been lifted. They coach and play free and win lots of games.

Reason they won’t win the North: I am wrong about LaFleur, Jordan Love and the rest of the roster and the whole year is a disaster. My son is sad and I am embarrassed.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Aaron Jones isn’t getting much love but he runs for a thousand yards every year and catches lots of passes. What’s not to like. Plus he will probably get additional work while Love finds his footing. You can’t go wrong drafting Christian Watson but Love also really likes to throw the ball a lot to Romeo Doubs so he is a solid pick up in the later rounds.

Predicted Record: 12-5

2nd Place: Minnesota Vikings

The Vikings won 11 of their 13 games by one score last year. That probably isn’t happening again. And by finishing in first place they get the Eagles and 49ers from the other divisions. I think they will still win a lot of games just not as many as last year. They have a solid team and should be better on defense. If you watched the Netflix special Quarterbacks, then you know that Kirk Cousins is a good quarterback and perhaps the best person in the whole league. I want to be best friends with Kirk. But being nice doesn’t always create winning. They have a lot of good weapons but I think they are headed for a typical depressing first round playoff loss.

Reason they will win the North: Kirk Cousins is so nice and such a good person that the rest of the division feels bad for him and just lets them win.

Reason they won’t win the North: No one is that lucky two years in a row.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Justin Jefferson is obvious and should probably be the first player off the board. TJ Hockenson should be one of the first tight ends to be drafted after Travis Kelce of course. A sneaky good pick is their running back, Alexander Mattison. Dalvin Cook is gone and Mattision always tears it up when Cook was out injured. No reason he can’t do that all the time. Kirk is draftable in the later rounds and is basically the equivalent of Joe Burrow but you can get him in round 9 instead of round 4.

Predicted Record: 11-6

3rd Place: Detroit Lions

On paper the Lions look pretty good. They have a lot of weapons and Jared Goff had arguably the best year of his career. They have a fun, energetic coach that everyone loves. So why am I down on the Lions? It seems everyone is forgetting one key thing…they are the Lions. Some franchises have some real low points and it takes a while for them to be good and make the playoffs and win championships again. In fact every team goes through that at some level. The Lions have been going through it since 1957. Since 1957 they have played 13 playoff games. They have won 1. Jared Goff had a good season last year. You remember the last time he had a good season? The following year he was so bad that the Rams traded him to Detroit. I understand the hype. They have a lot of young offensive weapons. But at the end of the day, they are still the Lions and until they prove otherwise I can’t have them higher than 3rd.

Reason they win the North: They are as good as everyone thinks/wants them to be and they live up to the expectations.

Reasons they won’t win the North: Lions are gonna lion.

Fantasy Players to draft: St. Brown is an obvious early pick. He should be gone by early to mid 2nd round. Gibbs and Montgomery both have upside potential but will likely split carries. It is odd that they had a productive backfield last year, dumped them both and replaced them with two other guys that will likely split carries. Drafting Gibbs in the first round was an odd choice to say the least. I wouldn’t draft him but keep an eye on their rookie Tight End, La Porta. he could be a solid pick up if he performs well early on.

Predicted Record: 8-9

4th Place: Chicago Bears

Did the Bears get better? Sure. But they couldn’t really get worse. I am not sure why we all think Justin Fields is going to be amazing. I mean he could be amazing in fantasy football but I doubt that translates to real life. He doesn’t throw especially well, he holds on to the ball too long and he runs around so much he is basically an injury waiting to happen. If he is playing by week 8, I’ll be shocked. While the o-line and defense has improved a little bit…they still aren’t good. So why are the all of the sudden awesome? Because they traded for a decent receiver? I don’t get it.

Reason they will win the North: Fields stays healthy, learns to throw a better ball and the defense is way better than anyone expects.

Reason they won’t win the North: Being a good fantasy quarterback doesn’t necessarily make you a good actual quarterback.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Its hard to recommend not drafting Justin Fields, so I won’t. But if I were to draft him, I would break my own rule and draft another QB too which I never do. But that dude is getting hurt, we just don’t know if it will be week 1 or 16. DJ Moore is a solid pick up. I also recommend drafting their running back Herbert when he pops up. Cole Kmet is good late round tight end you can grab if you don’t like your options earlier.

Predicted Record: 6-11

AFC North:

1st Place: Cincinnati Bengals

Do I dislike the Bengals…absolutely. Are they good…absolutely. You can’t deny that they have a solid team that isn’t going anywhere. I do think that the division got better and there should certainly be concern about Burrow’s injury. We have heard he looks great but what we haven’t heard is that Kevin McCallister is going to start week 1. His buddy Jamar Chase says he doesn’t need to comeback until week 5. If he doesn’t, I think they can still make the playoffs but it will be much tougher to win the division. I think they got worse on defense especially on the backend. They are real excited about getting Orlando Brown which tells me they didn’t spend a lot of time watching Orlando Brown. But in the end, my belief is the best QB and coach win and they have the best combo in that category and probably the best DC as well.

Reason they will win the North: They have a great quarterback with great weapons and a crafty DC that will keep other teams from lighting up the scoreboard as much as they do.

Reason they won’t win the North: Their quarterback gets left “home alone”…because he is hurt.

Fantasy Players to Draft: You are not supposed to follow your heart when drafting but I break my own rule with Burrow and one other player. I can’t stand Burrow and his smug little face and his smug little answers to everything. But you can draft him if you want. While he is a very good quarterback, he doesn’t put up as many fantasy points as some of the other guys because he doesn’t run much and they run a pretty balanced attack. He is comparable to Herbert or Rodgers but you have to draft him earlier. Chase and Higgins are must pick ups. Tyler Boyd is a good insurance pick up in the later rounds in case one of the other two gets hurt. Mixon is decent but overvalued.

Predicted Record: 12-5 (assuming Joe starts week 1)

2nd Place: Pittsburgh Steelers

This is a really unlikeable division. I have never liked the Steelers but you got to respect them. I don’t like Mike Tomlin either, but he is a good coach. The guy has never had a losing season. I don’t see how they got worse…in fact they could be much better. But I think it all really depends on Kenny Pickett. He doesn’t have to be great but he has to be better. I know they won a lot of games late in the year but they also weren’t playing the toughest competition down the stretch. But I think Pickett is going to be alright. They got a lot of good weapons and got better at offensive line which was their biggest weakness. Their defense is outstanding and their schedule is fairly easy outside of the division.

Reason they will win the North: Lamar and Joe get hurt or start hurt and the Steelers stay healthy.

Reason they won’t win the North: Kenny isn’t as good as the other quarterbacks, Mike Tomlin gets frustrated and keeps getting more and more things stuck in his beard. That really has nothing to do with winning but it is gross so I felt obligated to point it out.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Najee Harris will be the first Steeler off the board. He’s a solid running back and should in theory be better because of the better o line but he may get the ball a little less if Pickett plays well. Mock drafts have Diontae Johnson going first but I prefer getting George Pickens later. Their tight end, Freiermuth is consistently okay in fantasy football.

Predicted Record: 11-6

3rd Place: Baltimore Ravens

I think the Ravens have a good team and they hardly ever miss the playoffs. But they are the 49ers of the east and everyone on their team always gets hurt. They added injury prone OBJ and drafted Zay Flowers and have the best throwing running back in the league with Lamar Jackson. Tyler Huntley even did alright backing him up. They play their division tough and the schedule starts off pretty soft and the Ravens tend to start fast. I think they start off hot and everyone talks about them being one of the best teams and they are super bowl contenders and then Lamar gets hurt and then other people get hurt and then they run out of running backs, yada yada yada. But they win enough early to stay in the playoff hunt.

Reason they win the North: they stay healthy and Joe Burrow doesn’t.

Reason they won’t win the North: They do what the Ravens always do…get hurt a lot and play average football down the stretch.

Fantasy Players to Draft: A great strategy is actually to draft Lamar and then pick a young QB that you like as well. Lamar always starts off fast but then by the time he gets hurt hopefully the young guy has found his groove. You are kind of taking your chances with anybody on this team as they could get hurt or just not perform. But feel free to get OBJ, Dobbins, Flowers, or Bateman at some point in the draft. Mark Andrews is a solid tight end as long as Lamar is playing.

Predicted record: 10-7

4th Place: Cleveland Browns

Massage boy said the other day that he should be ranked among the best QBs and he just isn’t because he hasn’t played football in two years. Apparently he has forgotten that he played the last 6 games last year. I would want to forget that too, the way he played. All signs are pointing to that he is not playing well in the preseason either. They do have Nick Chubb who is a heck of a running back. They have some other pretty good skill players but it all comes down to Watson being able to play well. It would be the most Browns thing ever to give him the largest guarantee ever and then for him to turn around and be a bust. Perhaps he isn’t as good of a football player when he isn’t getting his massages. Whatever the case may be, if they don’t do well this year the Browns could be ruined for years to come.

Reasons they will win the North: Massage boy returns to form and the defense comes together, they use their last place schedule to their advantage.

Reasons they won’t win the North: Massage boy gets a massage but not a normal one but instead his creepy version of one and gets in trouble.

Fantasy Players to draft: Nick Chubb in the late first round is a great pick up. Amari Cooper is a solid player no matter who is playing QB. People think Elijah Moore is a good pick but I’m not sure. He lost favor in New York and I don’t trust the QB.

Predicted Record: 7-10

Tune in next week as we cover the West and then the following week we will start our normal rankings and 5 for Friday!

I have been playing fantasy football for many years now. I have been a league champion (thanks 2007 Tom Brady) and I have had some bad years. The last two years I have been commissioner of our family league, A House Divided. Playing with a lot of new people including my sister who is playing for the first time this year, inspired me to write this blog. I do have some credibility to write this as in the other league I am in I have sucked several years for different reasons. But when I try, barring a slew of injuries, I am a pretty competitive fantasy football manager. The last 2 years I have finished in second place. Two years ago, I mismanaged my team in the championship game which is on me. This year I needed Jamar Chase to score 3 points for the tie and 4 for the win. Chase hadn’t scored less than 3 points in any game all year. So I felt good about my chances. Then Damar Hamlin basically died and came back to life and the game got cancelled. It is hard to complain about losing a fake football league with your fake football team when someone almost dies. So I am less bitter than I normally would be. Anyway for those of you who are new or just want to get better or just want to read funny things about fake football teams, this is for you. There are 3 parts of Fantasy Football and Fifth-Down is giving you 5 tips for each part.

Pre-Draft:

Figure out the rules, scoring, positions, etc. of your league:

First you got to get the basics down. Is your league PPR, Half PPR, Standard scoring? How many points do you get for yards, touchdowns, turnovers, etc.? What positions do I have to start each week? So what do these things mean? PPR stands for points per reception. That means a player gets 1 point for every reception. Half PPR means a player gets half a point for every reception. Standard scoring does not give any points for receptions. All the leagues give points for yards and touchdowns. Some leagues give less points on TD passes for Quarterbacks. Some leagues give a point for every 10 yards where another league might only give a point for every 15 yards. All of these rules can be found on the league page online. This may seem silly, but let’s be honest the entire fantasy football thing is silly. But based upon your scoring, positions needed, and rules you may draft differently. Or at least you will know what is going on during the season.

Do Some Research:

When I first started playing, we did the draft in person with paper and a poster board. I would have 3 or 4 fantasy football magazines handy to give me tips on who to draft, etc. Now, the draft is online and much smoother and shorter. Along with that, your research options have grown drastically. The magazines are still there. But there is also online sites, podcasts, programs you can buy, etc. Now if you are new (or just not very good), you don’t need to go spend a bunch of money. But you can at least go online and look at rankings by position. There will be varying opinions on those rankings but there will be a lot of consistencies too. You don’t need to be a football expert to have a successful fantasy team but you do need to read the occasional article. Heck, you can even watch tv shows about it.

Mock it up:

How do you best prepare to manage your fake football team? Well by doing fake drafts, of course. You can again do these within the system that your fantasy league site. Mock Drafts are great practice for the actual draft. It’ll give you a feel for how the draft will move and how things happen. It can also be super addictive. I may or may not be mock drafting right now. This sounds obvious but make sure you pick a mock draft that has the same amount of teams as your league. (Also, you should know how many teams are in your league).

Who’s hurt and who’s in trouble:

Before the draft you also want to make sure you know who is injured and for how long. If they are out a couple of weeks that might not be a big deal. If they are out for 10 weeks you probably shouldn’t draft that person. Same with suspensions. You may want to wait a few extra rounds from drafting someone who is out 3 or 4 games but they are still draftable. Someone who is out for much longer than that you may want to pass on them or only take them in the very late rounds. Also, don’t draft Michael Thomas. He isn’t hurt but he will be soon enough.

What’s the make up of your team:

You need to know how many players you need at each position. Typical leagues will have something like this.

QB, RB,RB, WR, WR, TE, WR/RB/TE, K and defense and then usually 4 or 5 bench spots you can fill with any position. The WR/RB/TE in the starting lineup can be filled by any of those positions. This means in general you are going to need more wide receivers and running backs than anything else. You don’t need a back up kicker or defense on your bench. Not knowing what positions you need is a recipe for draft failure.

Part 2: The Draft

It’s Draft night, You’ve done your homework, now what?

Don’t be a homer:

3 years ago, my kids wanted to be a part of my fantasy football experience. It was in the middle of the pandemic so who was I to say know. We decided to only draft players for our 4 favorite teams in our house; Chiefs, Packers, Eagles and Broncos. This is much harder than you think especially in a league where most players are Chiefs fans. Needless to say we did not win the league. This may or may not be why I created our family league. This is an easy mistake to make. Your excited about your team so you say, draft Russell Wilson and Courtland Sutton early in the draft. The problem isn’t just that we pick players on our team. It’s the fact that we pick them too early. No one knew picking Russ and Sutton was such a mistake prior to the season. But drafting them in the early rounds was the mistake either way as they could have been drafted much later. In my non-family league, the person with the first pick drafted Kirk Cousins because he loves Kirk Cousins. (Who doesn’t after that Netflix special). Kirk is a quality fantasy football quarterback. The problem is they could have gotten Kirk in the 8th or 9th round instead of with the first pick.

You can wait on Kicker and Defense:

Another common mistake of new players is they feel like they have to fill all their starter spots first. So they draft a kicker or defense in the early to mid rounds. There is not a big gap between the best kicker and the 12th best kicker so you can wait on that. So just because all your other starting spots are open and you have a glaring hole at kicker doesn’t mean you need to draft one in round 7. Fill up your bench and get a kicker later.

You might want to wait on QB or TE as well if you don’t get one of the best ones early. There is also not a big difference between the 4th best QB and the 9th best QB.

Look ahead…with options:

The system will give you a ranking of players and even give you suggestions of who to draft. You have your person that you want to draft but the person right in front of you picks the player you were going to draft. You have to make a quick decision and in a panic you pick a quarterback and you already have 2 on your roster ( which is probably already 1 too many depending on your league). It’s happened to the best of us.

So as you are watching the draft unfold, try to have 3 or 4 players you are looking to draft. That way if your first choice isn’t there, you are ready to go.

The Clock is your friend, not your enemy:

Depending on your commissioner you will have somewhere between 30 seconds to 2 minutes to make your pick. Don’t let the pressure of the clock get to you. No matter what the time frame is, you have plenty of time. So take a breath and then take your time and make your pick. At the same time, you don’t have to take the whole time to make your pick just because you can. I love the draft as much as the next guy but that doesn’t mean we have to make it last as long as possible.

Your Draft Grade matters…just not that much:

At the end of the draft, you will get a grade for your efforts. This will give you a sense of how good your team is and how you compare to the competition. But honestly it mostly based upon what the system thinks you should have done so don’t put too much emphasis on it. As the old saying goes C’s get degrees so if you got a C or better you are fine. And no one knows what is going to happen anyway so the grades are pretty worthless.

Part 3: The Season

Okay, you did some preparation, you drafted your team now lets play some fake football.

Check your line up:

The easiest recipe for failure is to not have enough players in your lineup. Fantasy Football is not the time for a “my team is on the court” Hoosiers moment. Chances of you winning each week goes down dramatically if you don’t have a full starting roster. Every Sunday about an hour before each game they announce who is not playing. Also, you need to pay attention to which teams have byes. If you have a wonderful commissioner like me, they will remind you to check your lineups and give you an extra reminder when you have holes in your lineup. But you might not be that lucky and if you are, you should still check your lineup.

Work the Waiver Wire:

The Waiver Wire is where you can pick up players who aren’t on anyone’s team. You have to drop a player to pick up a new player. You don’t have to do this every week or anything but you should do it occasionally. The draft is fun but really just the beginning of building your team. Some players you draft will underperform and so you can cut those players and add other players who are doing better. You can even pick up players you don’t really need in order to keep someone else from getting them. Not that I ever do that.

Do a little bit of research:

How do you know who to pick up, might be your next question. Well guess what there are tons of articles, shows and podcasts about this exact topic. If you have the app for your league on your phone, these articles will actually pop up and they are typically 3-5 minute reads. They put the information right in front of you. All you have to do is read it.

Don’t be a quitter:

It happens every year that certain players tend to be active early but if their team struggles or starts to get some injuries they stop trying. This is a bummer for the player and the league. Other teams that play that team get easy wins and it makes the whole thing less fun. We have a player in our family league who has not had much success the first two years. But there hasn’t been one week where she hasn’t at least tried a little by making sure she at least has no holes in her lineup. You won’t always have a winning team but you can be a winner by trying. Sure she doesn’t have any championships, but she has my respect. Which is really more important. Okay, not really but it is a nice consolation prize.

Watch football and enjoy:

I would already watch all the games regardless. But now all of the sudden we have interest in games and players we normally wouldn’t. We watch in excitement to see our players on our teams score touchdowns and light up our scoreboard of our fake team in a fake game. It is hours of fun. Now that first week game between the Cardinals and the Commanders as some meaning. Not a lot because there aren’t a ton of draftable players on either of those teams…but still a little bit of meaning. So soak it all in. The next 20 weeks you will be tracking football like never before…even if it is only because I have reminded you to do so.

Good luck to all the managers of fake football teams out there. May the injury report be in your favor.

We continue with our preview series including overall take, fantasy football tips and predictions. This week we head to the South. There are a lot of great football teams in the South. The problem for this post is all those teams are college teams. On the NFL side, the South divisions are arguably the worst in both conferences. Last year’s division winners were a combined 17-17 and those were the best teams in the division. Not only do we get the joy of these teams playing their own division but these two divisions also play each other. You are going to see these teams playing each other in the early time slot on Sundays…a lot.

NFC South

1st Place: New Orleans Saints

Do I think the Saints are good…not really. Do I think they have the most competent Quarterback and players…yes. Look Carr is not great but we at least know what we are getting. And besides last year he looked pretty good. And to be fair no one looks good when Josh McDaniel is your coach. They also have the most veteran players who have actually won something. Their defense is very good and they have some younger players stepping up on the offensive side of the ball. The biggest question mark is the coach but I am not a believer in any of the other coaches in the division either. Carr never won a playoff game for the Raiders and as a Chiefs fan, it would bring me much joy for him to go to a new team and immediately win one.

Reason they will win the South: Carr returns to his top form, defense plays great and their schedule is real easy.

Reason they won’t win the South: Their head coach is as bad as everyone says he is and screws it all up.

Fantasy Players to draft: Alvin Kamara shouldn’t be draftable because he should be suspended for the season but instead he is only out 3 games so he is draftable. You have to put your emotions aside when playing fantasy football. I once had a team of mostly players that had gotten in trouble and did quite well that year. Anyway, he is still a top running back when he plays. And you can get him a little later than he would normally go. Olave is a great young receiver that should get better with a bit of an upgrade at QB. Taysom Hill is in interesting one as well. Even though he didn’t play any at tight end last year, the Fantasy Football programs don’t know what to list him at. So you can have a tight end that might come in and rush for a couple of tds and then throw for another. Not too shabby. I am sure Michael Thomas will be hurt by the time you draft or shortly after that so don’t draft him.

Predicted Record: 10-7

2nd Place: Carolina Panthers

All the reports are that Bryce Young is amazing. He is teaching protections, throwing great balls, etc. But lets remember that as AI once said…”we talking about practice.” Everyone is paper champions this time of year. Let’s see him do well in a game against other teams before we place him on a pedestal. The other issue could be injuries. He got hurt at Bama and is small. I think he could be a Kyler Murray that actually cares. So he’ll do more studying then playing call of duty but could still easily get banged up. They have some good young players but no one that really scares you. And they have a coach that had some success and some failures as a head coach so far. I think this is a team that could get better as the year goes on but probably is a year or two away.

Reason they will win the South: Frank Reich returns to his old form, providing tutelage to the talented young QB and they lead the team to victory.

Reason they won’t win the South: Early head coach Frank Reich was a fluke, and what we have seen the last few years is the real Frank Reich. Bryce Young is Kyler Murray 2.0.

Fantasy Players to draft: Well, no one I feel real confident in. If you don’t get the QB you want and wait to draft one later, you might draft someone like Jared Goff for instance and then draft Young incase he pops. Sort of like you might have done with Justin Fields last year. Miles Sanders is serviceable and he might get more carries since they paid him a chunk of change. They have to throw to someone so Hayden Hurst, Adam Theilen and DJ Chark are all draftable I guess. I’d go with Chark out of the 3. He is the only one that doesn’t seem like he is on the back end of his career.

Predicted Record: 7-10

3rd Place: Atlanta Falcons

The Falcons had a great running game last year with 3 solid running backs, but had bad QB play and a worse defense. So what do the Falcons do with the 8th pick in the draft? They draft a running back. This is how bad teams stay bad. Robinson I am sure will do well and will get the ball a lot but with so many other needs and already having quality backs it was an odd choice to say the least. Desmond Ridder could be alright but is far from a sure thing. To be honest any of these teams could win the division and then host and lose a playoff game. But does anyone else think Arthur Smith looks scared all the time? He has that deer in the headlights look about him. That combined with questionable quarterback play and what seems like sort of a lost organization in general lands them in 3rd.

Reason they will win the South: Every year one team goes from worst to first and this dumpster fire of a division is the easiest one to do it in.

Reason they won’t with the South: They are a running team in a passing league.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Well, if you are going to draft a running back that you don’t need with the 8th pick in the draft, you better get him the dang ball. Alliger is a decent pick up late for running back depth. Everyone is high on Drake London but he still has Ridder throwing to him so I am less of a fan. If you like to be disappointed, draft Kyle Pitts.

Predicted Record: 7-10

4th Place: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Their stupid coach with the dumb hat left the team in the hands of Todd Bowles and it did not go well. It went so poorly that even made Tom Brady finally retire. Because the rest of the division was so terrible the Bucs still went to the playoffs. They hosted the Cowboys who absolutely smashed them which is extra amazing because the Cowboys haven’t played a good playoff game since 1996. With Brady retired, they are rolling with either Baker Mayfield or Kyle Trask. Baker is really entertaining as long as he isn’t on your team. Let’s be honest, this team is on a downward spiral and it isn’t going to get better soon. They got lucky that Brady chose to make them relevant for a couple of years. Although they have some good veteran players, I believe they will lose early and often and those guys will lose interest. Back to losing lots of games and drafting really high for the Bucs.

Reason they will win the South: Tom Brady gets bored half way through the year and comes out of retirement. The rest of the division is so bad that he is able to lead them to enough victories to win it.

Reason they won’t win the South: Todd Bowles is their coach and Baker Mayfield is their quarterback.

Fantasy Players to draft: There are a few sure things in life, one of them is Mike Evans gaining a thousand yards. Chris Godwin is good as well but get hurt a lot and will likely suffer due to who is throwing to him. Their running back White is decent and good running back depth.

Predicted Record: 5-12

AFC South

1st Place: Jacksonville Jaguars

The only team in either south division that I have any faith in is the Jaguars. I am all in on the Jags being the team to beat so I am sure they will be terrible. But if I am right, which I think I am, this team should have a very good year. Lawrence got better as the year went on. He is super talented and is just starting to untap his potential. He is like Sunshine in Remember the Titans. He couldn’t make that pitch but once he could…it was history for everyone else. Sunshine and Doug Pederson have a lot of good years ahead of them starting with this year. And their schedule is a breeze. Even if they lose to all the other major AFC opponents they can still easily win 10 games and 10 games should be plenty to win the division.

Reason they will win the division: They have the best QB/Coach combo in the division and it isn’t close.

Reason they won’t win the division: Lawrence gets hurt or Pederson coaches the season like he did the last game he ever coached for the Eagles.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Lawrence, obviously. Their running back Entienne should be an early pick as well. There aren’t a lot of great tight ends but Engram is a pretty good choice. Calvin Ridley gets a new start after sitting out last year for gambling. He should have a good year. Christian Kirk is an underrated pick up in the late rounds.

Predicted Record: 12-5

2nd Place: Tennessee Titans

The Titans lost like their last 7 games last year and still almost won the division. That says more about the division than it does the Titans. They have a very good but aging running back who no longer is unstoppable. Henry has gotten hurt a couple of years in a row now. Seems like maybe they have leaned on him a little too much. Tannehill should be better now that D-Hop is on the team. He was pretty decent when he could throw the ball up to AJ Brown all the time so this could be similar. The schedule is not overly challenging but the Titans are not overly good. This has the classic Mike Vrabel 9 win season written all over it.

Reason they will win the division: Tannehill lights it up, Henry doesn’t get hurt and Vrabel coaches lights out to enough victories to edge out the Jags.

Reason they won’t win the division: They are running team with an aging running back and a terrible offensive line.

Fantasy Players to draft: D-Hop scored a lot of fantasy points with Colt McCoy throwing to him. He will be just find here. Although I am not high on Henry, he will still get the ball a lot and you have to sort of draft him sometime in the 2nd round. People like their tight end as a pick. I am not one of those people.

Predicted Record: 9-8

3rd Place: Houston Texans

The Texans are the worst run organization in most all of sports. So this really tells you something about how I feel about the Colts. Lots of people are hyping them up because of their new coach, DeMeco Ryans. I’m just hoping they give him more than one year to find out. I think they will be better because they can’t be worse…but then again, I thought that two years ago too. I think CJ Stroud could be alright. He will be better than David Mills. On paper they do appear to have gotten better. 5 or 6 wins isn’t unreasonable but the management of this organization is so piss poor I am sure they will find a way to screw it up.

Reason they will win the division: The Jags never come back from Europe and the Titans run out of players.

Reason they won’t win the division: they still have the same owner and gm of the last few years.

Fantasy Players to draft: Woof. I don’t know. Dameon Pierce served me pretty well last year. All the fantasy experts say you should draft Nico Collins and he is underrated. So you can draft him, if you want.

Predicted Record: 5-12

4th Place: Indianapolis Colts

What’s worse than the Texans with an unproven quarterback? How about the Colts with an unproven quarterback? The Colts are working hard to top the Texans as the worst run organization in the league. They have had a new quarterback every year since Andrew Luck left. Now they are in a fight with their best player Jonathan Taylor. The hired an inexperience coach so I guess they are making progress because the last guy they hired had less coaching experience than me. There is just not a lot to be positive about when it comes to this team right now. I already miss Jeff Saturday being their coach. It was really good material.

Reason they will win the division: Peyton Manning, Eric Dickerson, Marvin Harrison and Reggie Wayne travel to the future from the past to lead this team to glory.

Reason they will lose the division: they have an inexperienced coach, leading a bad roster of a team ran by a crazy man.

Fantasy Football Players to draft: Jonathan Taylor if he plays and Michael Pittman because they have to throw to someone and they will be behind a lot.

Predicted Record: 4-13 (this feels generous)

Tune in next week when we visit the North.

I know many of you like myself were very frustrated and appalled at the 3 game suspension Alvin Kamara got after being caught on camera beating the crap out of a guy with 3 of his friends. A lot of the suspensions seem to not match up the crime if you will. It all seems illogical how they come up with these numbers for suspensions. This is why fifth-down went out of their way to find answers and we found the unpublished guidelines of suspensions from the NFL. This should help clear some things up and help you know what to expect in the future. Below you will see the acts that can lead to a suspension and the equivalent games that one will be suspended.

Hitting a girl- 2 games

Lying about hitting a girl but then being found out you lied about it because it is on camera- 8 games

Knocking a girl out- 2 games

Knocking a girl out on camera- life suspension

Sexual assault- announced as 6 games but gets talked down to 4

Hitting another player in the head with your helmet- suspended indefinitely but it is really 6 games

Hitting a guy- no suspension

Hitting a guy on camera- no suspension but you will get a stern talking to

Hitting and kicking the crap out of a guy with your friends on camera-1 game suspension per friend who helped you

Breaking a vacuum- 4 games

Being accused of something legally that involves the word domestic- 6 games

Tyreek Hill does whatever he wants to whoever he wants- no suspension

Betting on sports other than football- 6 games

Betting on football- 1 season

Betting the Royals won’t lose 100 games- 2 seasons for being an idiot

Doing inappropriate things to masseuses and/or making them uncomfortable- approximately 1 game for every two masseuses give or take a masseuse.

Kicking a puppy- 12 games (everyone loves puppies)

Kicking a kitty- 9 games (1 for each life) People like kitties but not as much as they like puppies

Running a dog fighting rink- You are going to jail bro. But don’t worry you can come back and no one will ever speak about it again.

Accidentally taking something you weren’t suppose to take- 6 games

Purposely taking something you weren’t suppose to take- 6 games

Drinking and Driving- 2 games

Smoking weed- 1 season

Making a political statement 5 years ago- banned for life

Not making a political statement now- banned for life

Deflating balls- 4 games

Tying your opponents shoes together- 2 games (1 for each shoe, obviously)

Robbery, reckless driving, drug dealing, and other crimes- traded to the Raiders

Obstructing evidence, hiding/destroying evidence and leaving the scene of the crime of a double murder that your buddies committed- 250k fine, no suspension and later elevated to ambassador of the game

This should now all make sense. This is obviously completely accurate. Either that, or they just draw a number out of a hat. We are looking into it.

After a couple of month hiatus, Fifth Down is back. No one asked us to come back but we are back none the less. We are just 5 weeks away from the start of the NFL season which means I’ll have something to write about every week as the Tuesday rankings and 5 for Friday will return. But to get you ready for the upcoming season, I’m going to give you a sneak preview of each division over the next 4 Fridays and then will conclude with my playoff predictions. We kick it off with the East from both conferences.

NFC EAST

1st Place: Philadelphia Eagles

I know we talk about the hangover from the team that loses the super bowl and how they haven’t made it back to the game since the Patriots in 2018 or whatever and it rarely happened prior to that, yada yada yada. But as of late the loser also doesn’t fall off a cliff. The losers from the last two super bowls both lost by 3 points in the AFC Championship game the following year. Not too shabby. The Eagles have the two things you need to be successful in the NFL. A really good quarterback and a really good coach. Jalen Hurts has proven he is a high quality QB and I am not sure why he is never mentioned in the top 5. I mean besides Mahomes and Burrow, who else are you for sure taking over him? Dude can do it all and that stupid QB push play is impossible to stop. Sirianni is kind of goofy and weird but he has shown he can not only coach but be an executive of a team. The players seem to love him and play hard for him. This seems like a successful set up for years to come.

Reason they will win the East: They have the QB and the coach as mentioned and the rest of the division isn’t very good.

Reason they won’t win the East: No one has won this division in back to back years since 2004. Will they make it a 19th year without a repeat? Or will the Eagles be the first team to do it since…the Eagles did it from 2001-2004.

Fantasy Players to Draft: The Eagles are fantasy rich. Hurts should be the top QB target besides Mahomes. AJ Brown and Devontae Smith are both worth drafting. Dallas Goedert is an underrated Tight End who I think will perform about as well as Kittle or Andrews but you can get him 2-3 rounds later…you’re welcome.

Predicted record: 13-4

2nd Place: Dallas Cowboys

While I love the Eagles QB and Coach, I have zero faith in the Cowboys combo. Both have had some success but seem to rip defeat from the jaws of victory way more than they do the other way around. They continue to overpay the wrong players, like giving a big contract to a CB who while does get a lot of interceptions also gets burnt a lot. They overpaid Zeke and ended up dropping him. They overpaid Dak. They will probably over pay Pollard and Lamb in a few years. This is how you stay relevant but don’t actually ever win anything. It’s the Cowboy way.

Reason they will win the East: They have a great overall roster and again, no one has won the east 2 years in a row in 18 years. If the Eagles don’t win it, the Cowboys are the next likely choice.

Reason they won’t win the East: Because Dak likes to throw it to the other team in crucial situations.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Pollard and Lamb should both be off the board early and often. First two rounds for both of those guys. Their defense does get a lot of turnovers so if you don’t stream defenses (which you should) then grabbing them isn’t terrible. Also, they do like to throw to their tight ends a lot so if you realize it is the 12th or 13th round and you haven’t drafted a tight end yet, (happens to the best of us) then Schoonmaker could be a good sleeper. Plus his name is fun to say. Although Dak does throw a lot of picks he also throws for a lot of yards. He is a decent QB to pick up in the middle rounds.

Predicted record: 11-6

3rd Place: the NY Football Giants

The Giants had a surprisingly successful season this past year. I do like their coach but they also made it into the playoffs last year with a 9-7-1 record so it wasn’t like they were crushing it. Danny Dimes while likable, isn’t all that good. The defense is solid but not great. And that receiving core is rough. There answer to that was to trade for a tight end. I think they have a slightly worse season and miss the playoffs.

Reason they will win the East: Danny Dimes proves me wrong, 3 no name receivers become household names and Barkley not only stays healthy but has an MVP like season.

Reason they won’t win the East: None of the above is happening.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Barkley gets hurt sometimes but he is worth the risk. Waller might be a sneaky good pick if you can get him in the middle rounds. He also gets hurt a lot so you might want to draft him and Kittle and hope that they get injured at different times in the season.

Predicted Record: 9-8

4th Place: Washington…whatever they are called

Washington is not good. They do not have a good roster. They have an unknown at QB and they have a pretty good but not really good coach. I wish them the best because I do like Eric Bieniemy who is now the offensive coordinator. They have some decent pieces here and there but nothing to write home about. But hey at least they got read of their terrible owner so even if they go 0-17, this season is a win.

Reason they will win the East: Every year lately, some team goes from worst to first so maybe it will be them.

Reason they won’t win the East: It won’t be them.

Fantasy Players to draft: I firmly believe Terry McLaurin could be a top 10 fantasy receiver with good QB play. But he won’t have that so utilize him as your 3rd receiver and to help with bye weeks. Brian Robinson did alright for a few weeks and you should be able to get him in later rounds for depth. Jahon Dotson is also talented but until we see what Sam Howell can do I am passing on him too. Basically don’t rush to draft any Washington players.

Predicted Record: 5-12

AFC East

1^st Place: Buffalo Bills

I understand that the Bills season didn’t end exactly as they had planned.   I mean they had a player almost die so I think that threw them off a little.   But if we are honest, they weren’t looking great before then either.   But I am also not sure how they got worse.   They will have some injured players back and drafted well.  They still have a good coach and a great quarterback which is my NFL criteria for success.   They both have their short comings but is there really a coach/QB combo that you have more confidence in this division?   I know the hype train is strong for the Jets and the Dolphins and I think both will be good…but give me the Bills to win the division again.

Reason the will win the East: They have the best quarterback, the best receiver, and the most known competent coach.

Reason they won’t win the East: They are the Bills and the Bills like to break the hearts of their fans.

Fantasy Players to draft: to me, Josh Allen should be the 3^rd QB off of everyone’s board after Mahomes and Hurts.   Like Hurts, Allen will get you lots of rushing scores but unlike a Justin Fields type he won’t get injured a bunch.   After Allen, Diggs is an easy late first round or early second round pick.   I also think that they are going to give the ball to James Cook a lot so he is a strong pick up as well.   After that, their rookie tight end, Dalton Kincaid is a sleeper pick.  But he is also sort of everyone’s sleeper pick so let someone else reach for him or pick him in the later rounds if available.

Predicted Record: 12-5

2^nd Place: New York Jets

Look, I don’t want to believe the hype.   In fact, originally my bold prediction was that the Packers would make the playoffs and the Jets wouldn’t.   But it seems like everyday the Jets do something to be better.   Since coming out of the cave or whatever, Rodgers is doing everything he should have done in Green Bay, took less money, bonding with the younger players…doing this crazy thing called practicing.  Sometimes a guy needs a change of scenery.   This team still has issues.   Their O-line is suspect.   Their defense feasted on a bad schedule last year.   The verdict on the coaching staff is still out.   But they have too much talent to flop.   The first 6 weeks are brutal…but after that the schedule gets much easier.   Does this mean I think they are going to the super bowl?   No…I think Rodgers and a young team are not the group to make a deep playoff run.   But Jets fans should be happy just to make it since they have the longest drought in the NFL. They will be happy to pass that title on to the Broncos.

Reason they will win the East: Rodgers plays inspiring ball, gets back to his old form and leads the Jets back to glory.

Reason they won’t win the East: They get off to a rough start and Rodgers starts contemplating life instead of studying the playbook.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Rodgers loves to throw a lot to one guy and I think that guy is going to be Garrett Wilson.  Hell, he could be the #1 fantasy receiver this year.   If Cook signs then he is definitely worth picking up.   I also like Hall but am nervous about him coming off an injury.   It’s wait and see on the other receivers for me.   Rodgers isn’t a bad pick up late.   He could turn out to be the equivalent of a Burrow or Herbert using a 9-11 round pick instead of a 4-6 round pick. 

Predicted Record: 11-6

3^rd Place: Miami Dolphins

The Dolphins have a ton of weapons and a QB that is good enough when healthy.   But being healthy has been quite the issue. I am not one to make fun of a guy with a lot of head injuries so I will leave it to that. They have a quirky, funny head coach who does seem to know what he is doing. Isn’t it great that nerds can now make millions coaching NFL football teams? It’s like they are living every Madden player’s dream. Their defense is going to have to drastically get better to make the playoffs again. Scheduling plays such a big role when it comes to making the playoffs. Their schedule this year is brutal. While I like the Dolphins and their coach I think they take a step back record wise. If Tua plays 15 or 16 games they will have a much better chance at getting in.

Reason they will win the East: Mike McDaniel switches it over to Rookie level on Madden and dominates the league.

Reason they won’t win the East: Tua gets hurt…again and again and again.

Fantasy Players to Draft: Tyreek can’t keep mouth shut and can’t stop hitting people but he also can’t stop scoring fantasy points. He is a mid to late first round pick. Jaylen Waddle would be the number 1 receiver on around 28 of the 32 teams. He’s outstanding and is probably the best 2nd receiver in the fantasy world. I am waiting to see if anyone becomes the guy in the backfield. I had to look up who their tight end is so I am out on him and unless you are playing in a two QB league, I’d pass on Tua as well.

Predicted Record: 9-8

4th Place: New England Patriots

The all time winningest coach is only 80-86 without Tom Brady as his Quarterback. That’s not great. I don’t see that record getting better this year. Look, he is too good of a coach for the team to fall apart and be terrible. However, the talent and QB play is just not there. I mean who’s their number 1 target? JuJu? I think JuJu is funny but he is not a #1 receiver. And the rest of the division got better. The schedule is tough. I mean, this team could start 0-4. The middle of the schedule lightens up just enough for them to hang around in the playoff hunt for a little bit. But 3 of their last 4 games are against the Chiefs, Bills and Jets. Ouch. Looks like another year without a playoff appearance without Tom Brady. Maybe they can get him to come out of retirement in 2024.

Reason they will win the East: Belichick finds a new way to cheat by creating a time machine. He goes back in time is actually nice to Tom Brady and other stars. Then comes back to current time but has changed the future so all the good players are still on his team. He wins another championship but is so grumpy that Tom and everyone else retires again at the end of the season.

Reason they won’t win the East: Belichick’s time machine plan is foiled and he remains extra grumpy and wins 7 games.

Fantasy Players to draft: Not a lot of great choices here. Stevenson is a good back and could be the lone starter with Damien Harris gone. But they like to do things by committee and I don’t like how high he is going in mock drafts. They got to throw to somebody so you can draft JuJu late if you want.

Predicted Record: 7-10

Tune in next week when I tell you everything you need to know about the South.

Last night was the big night! NFL Schedules are out. Also, the Nuggets absolutely crushed the Suns. The Nuggets had 81 points in the first half, meanwhile the 76ers had 86 points in their entire game. Meanwhile, the Royals have been .500 in their last 10 games and have doubled their wins for the year and tripled their wins at home. Amazingly, no matter how bad the Cardinals are the Royals are managing to continue to still be the worst team in Missouri as the Cards still have a better record. But no one cares about any of that because the NFL Schedule is out. So let’s dive in.

The Non-Release, Release night:

The NFL really tries to make this a big deal but they are about as good at keeping secrets as the gossip queen is at your high school (you know who you are). The girl you would tell something to if you wanted the word to get out but didn’t want to go to the trouble to tell everyone yourself, you remember her? First, they announce half the games during the week anyway and then all the leaks start. There are one off’s like leaking that we are opening up against the Lions for some reason (more on that in a minute). But there were also bigger leaks, like the entire Green Bay Packers schedule. By the time 8 pm eastern rolls around, you already know pretty much everything. Also, they just release them all at once. They should do it March Madness style only announce one week at a time instead of one region at a time. You know we would all sit there waiting to see who your favorite team plays in week 7. I got the entire Broncos schedule read to me on the radio on my way home at 6 pm Mountain time. Good news for you Broncos fans, the radio guys say you are going to start 4-0 pretty easily. So after 4 weeks you will have 80% of the wins you had all of last year. And the radio guys have never been wrong about predicting the success of your team. Except for last year. And the year before. And the year before that. And the year before that year. And they were wrong about 2018. But before that, I am sure they were right. I’m not sure because I didn’t live here yet. But they seem like a pretty unbiased group so I am sure they nailed it.

We are playing who for the opener???

The first game is always supposed to be this big marquee match up. After winning the super bowl a few years back we opened up with the Texans which made sense because we had just beaten them in one of the craziest playoff games ever. The following year the Bucs hosted the Cowboys. As much as I don’t like the Cowboys, they are well known and popular and bring great viewership. Last year the Rams hosted the Bills. The Bills are a super bowl contender and were perhaps 13 seconds away from playing the Rams in the super bowl. So I get it. But the Lions? Really? The Lions had a very good year for them last year when they won a whopping 9 games. Now they are ready to win the division apparently. Everyone is high on them but the media is high on a lot of dumb things. Everyone is high on the Bears for instance because of Justin Fields. Guys, Justin Fields is good at fantasy football, not real football. He isn’t accurate and doesn’t win games. He just runs around a lot and get hurt. But the media likes what they like without a lot of rhyme or reason. Look, the Lions no longer suck and they haven’t played at arrowhead for like 20 years for some odd reason so sure, lets play the Lions. Honestly, though I think the NFL knows our secret. We would watch anyone play in this first game. We don’t care, we just want football at this point. So they threw the Lions in there and saved what would have been much better match ups with the Eagles, Bengals, and Bills later in the season. And Mahomes is going to get people to watch no matter who is playing.

Rough Stretch for Danielle (my wife):

Being a Broncos fan has been hard enough the last 8 years. But imagine being a broncos fan and having your spouse’s favorite team go to the super bowl 3 times in the last 4 years and win 2. Imagine that same team has beaten your team 15 times in a row. You have a couple of kids but neither of them are on your side because they also cheer for winning teams in the Packers and Eagles. But yet, she is a trooper and sits on the couch every week with us and watches her team lose in between games of our teams winning.

Well over an 18 day stretch in October, she has to suffer through 2 Chiefs games and a battle against the Packers. So she will have to suffer through Walker and I’s shenanigans 3 weeks in a row. She said I should take Walker to the Packers game and I said sure. I said you don’t want to go? She just looked at me. Then she said that Savannah could go. And I said, I’ll take Savannah to the Chiefs game and she said no because I would be gone two full Sundays in a row because the games last all day. Walker said they don’t last all day, it is like 4 hours long. We were both given that look that says, don’t argue with your mother/wife. The schedule just got released and we are already fighting. The joy of football.

Undervalued/Overvalued:

One of my favorite things about this time year is that every fan base is listing a bunch of reasons why they are going to make the playoffs. It’s the time of paper champions. But guess what, if you have to justify why you are going to make the playoffs…you probably aren’t going to make the playoffs. But it is fun to pretend like you are this time of year, so I get it. So here are 3 overvalued and undervalued teams:

Undervalued

1. Packers: I don’t understand why everyone thinks they are going to be a dumpster fire all of the sudden. This is a team that has been competitive pretty much every year since I was in high school. They still have good players, a good defense and good coaches. Their division isn’t that impressive or tough and they also get to play the dumpster fire NFC South. They get the Rams, Steelers and Giants as their 3 extra games which isn’t exactly a gauntlet. They have the 9th easiest schedule in the league. You combine this with a competent organization and I think you have a winning formula. Also, maybe the departure of their high maintenance quarterback is exactly what they need.
2. Bills: I know it is odd seeing them on here but everyone is swooning over the Dolphins and especially the Jets. And I have to stop and ask why? The Bills still have the best coach and quarterback in the division. They also are the toughest place to play. Everyone is ready to crown the Jets and put the Dolphins as the Bills equal. But I think at the end of the year we will be looking at the standings with the Bills still on top.
3. Jaguars: I wrote at the end of the year that there are 4 great teams in the AFC, one in each division and I meant it. The Jags are good. But people are putting teams like the Ravens, Lions and Dolphins ahead of them. The Jags started slow but took off the second half of the season. They are never out of a game and I think they will be much improved this season. They are the real deal. Mark it down.

Overvalued

1. Jets: look I get that Rodgers is a huge improvement over everyone else they had at QB last year. But people are getting a little crazy when it comes to these predictions. First of all, Rodgers did not look good last year. Sure he is showing up with this new improved positive attitude and appears like he might actually want to play football and try. But you know what else it looks a little like? Russell Wilson last year. Heck, the same guy is even going to be calling plays. So why are we all sure that this is going to be a slam dunk. Even if they are good the schedule is rough, especially at the beginning. It’s not out of the question that they could be 2-4 after their first 6 games as they face the Bills, Cowboys, Chiefs and Eagles during that stretch not to mention two strong defenses in New England and Denver. The schedule gets easier from there but not easy. And if things start bad, does Rodgers get disinterested and check out? Look they could be really good and I know their defense is really solid. But I’d like to see them actually play before we crown them AFC champs.
2. Bears: As I mentioned earlier, I don’t get the obsession with the Bears. Yes, they got better in free agency and the draft…but they literally couldn’t have gotten worse. They were the worst team in the league last year. Unless you are the 49ers, this league is all driven by quarterbacks. The Bears have an inaccurate, injury prone one. The obsession of Fields based upon fantasy football numbers reminds me a lot of the hype around Kyler Murray and we all know how that turned out. To be fair to the Bears, the hype is that they will be competitive and a border line wild card contender as opposed to a super bowl contender. But I still don’t believe it. 5-12 here they come.
3. Ravens: Speaking of inaccurate, injury prone quarterbacks. Lamar got paid and now even though he isn’t a stat guy, he wants to throw for 6,000 yards because it has never been done before. Even if I thought Lamar was going to play 17 games, which I don’t, I wouldn’t rank the Ravens too high. They just added more injury prone players to an already injury prone team. They are the 49ers of the east only not as good. And they are changing their offense. Well Lamar is only good in the offense they created around him but that same offense got him hurt. So now what? I have a strong suspicion that the Ravens are going to regret signing that check.

Arrowhead invitational #6 here we come:

There are no easy games in the NFL but the Chiefs schedule on paper is easier than last year when we opened with 8 straight games against playoff teams from the year before. It is hard to really judge the strength of schedule until we start playing games. But the Chiefs usually start off strong, get a little sluggish in the middle and then finish strong. Well this year, the middle of the year is probably the easiest part. We get the Eagles, Bengals and Bills at home. We get the Jets early. Even if the Jets are good, my guess it takes them a little while to put it together. And two upstart teams in the Lions and Jaguars we play early on and can catch them before they get started. All is good news when we look at hosting yet another AFC Championship game. I’ll do week by week prediction later but I don’t see why 13-4 or 14-3 isn’t possible yet again. I think you probably need to win at least 13 to get the number one seed. While that’s not a sure thing by any means, if you look at the schedule and where and when games land, I think we are in a good spot. I am sure if we win the Super Bowl again, Skip Bayless will still say Mahomes sucks because he’s never won a road playoff game. But Skip also said Baker Mayfield was going to be a bigger thing in Cleveland than LeBron so I think we can all go ahead and assume anything that comes out of Skip’s mouth is nonsense.

More football talk to soon, but for now, thanks for reading and have a great weekend!

It’s been a busy week lets get into my top 5 reactions for the week.

Lakers Fans are the worst:

There is one insufferable fan base in every major sport. You have the Yankees in baseball, the Cowboys in football, and the Lakers in basketball. Now, don’t get me wrong, us Chiefs fans can be pretty insufferable of late because of all the winning. But that is all because of the pent up angst of 50 years of not winning it all. Now we are winning a lot and we are super annoying about it. But these fan bases are annoying whether they are winning or losing. I am in several sports groups on Facebook and it never fails that these are the loudest jackasses in the groups. Take this week, the Lakers win a close game by 5 against the Warriors. They are all over the place talking about how great they are, how they are going to win everything and ridiculing everyone who doubted them. Then they turn around and lose game 2 by 30 and they are saying things like we were content with splitting the first 2 games. They weren’t interested in winning this one, etc. Annoying. I have never liked the Lakers but I dislike them more than ever. I was already cheering for the Warriors but watching the beat down last night was even sweeter than expected. Looking forward to game 3. I’m changing my prediction from Warriors in 7 to Warriors in 6.

Shut up, Deion:

I know many people love Deion and are taking an odd pride in how poorly he is treating the current/former players at CU. Look I get that they sucked and I don’t have a problem with you telling them that they should consider transferring and that he is bringing in his own players in. But everyone is acting like the CU players are a bunch of cry babies. They are just stating what happened when asked about it. The truth is he didn’t even talk to these kids. One kid he told him that he did everything right, played great throughout practice and still wasn’t going to play. This was the first time that Deion had talked to that kid. Others said he never spoke to them. Look I am not one of these everyone should get a participation trophy type of guy. But Deion is this self promoting “good, Christian, role model” guy. I am pretty sure Jesus would have at least talked to these kids. And now after the draft, Deion had this to say about players from small schools not getting drafted.

“I’m ashamed of the 31 other@nfl teams that couldn’t find draft value in ALL of the talented HBCU players & we had 3 more draft worthy players at JSU.”

Dude, you left the small college for a bigger one. You are mad at the NFL for ignoring the same level of schools that you abandoned. Sit this one out, dude.

Royally worse and worse:

I’ve seen some Cardinal fans complaining a lot about their team lately. This is why you drive us crazy, not as people…but as fans. This mostly stems from jealousy but your team always starts slow and then after the All-Star break they go on a run and make the playoffs. But, but, but…this year is different. No it isn’t. Shut up. If you want to talk about bad, lets talk about 2-14 at home bad. Lets talk about the least amount of runs in the league bad. Let’s talk about 3-7 in your last 10 and that being your best 10 game run bad. Let’s talk about a .250 winning percentage bad. Let’s talk about being 10 games back in the worst division in baseball bad. We haven’t had a winning record in 8 years. We don’t have a playoff drought, we have a winning drought. Cardinals fans goal is to win the whole thing. We talk about winning 75 games which we won’t do by the way. I have always said no matter what part of your life we are talking about, there is always somebody worse off and somebody better off. So remember that complaining Cards fans…and us Royals fans will remember the A’s.

Chiefs make some moves:

In some better news about our good team, the Chiefs finally signed McKinnon so he is back. This is good news. Pacheco is going to be the guy running the ball but McKinnon is great on 3rd down for blocking and as an outlet. You can also put them both on the field at the same time which is nice. So we are set there. We also signed Left Tackle Donovan Smith. He had sort of a rough year last year and had some injuries but prior to that when healthy, he was very good. Also, people are making a big deal about the 9 million but it is actually “up to” 9 million. My guess is he makes 9 million if he starts. So either he plays well and get to start at left tackle or he is a savvy veteran to back up the young guys. I see no losing here. And if he is good to go, then Taylor can play Right tackle where he has played his whole career. The O-Line just got better because I think Smith is better than Orlando and Taylor is way better than Wylie. Maybe our tackles won’t lead the league in pressures allowed this year.

NFL is King:

Not that there was really any doubt but with the NHL and NBA playoffs going on, the main thing I watched last weekend was the draft. I’d rather watch the 7th round of the draft than Hockey. But here is the real way you know the NFL is king. They have a schedule release program. That’s right, next Thursday night they are going to reveal everyone’s schedule on live tv. Every other league is like, here is our schedule. But the NFL makes a whole thing about it. Why? Because we are going to watch, that’s why! I am more excited about this event than any of the playoff games going on. And I am not alone. Anything Football is better than everything else. Also, my prediction is we play the Bengals in week 1. We will find out if I am right on Thursday!

Have a great weekend everyone!