After going 5-0 in back to back weeks, I only went 3-2 this past week. This is what I get for picking the Chargers. This puts my season record at 24-7. Let’s see if I can bounce back this week. Even though there are 6 teams on bye there are some good games this week. Let’s dive in.

Battle of the crappy cities: Lions @ Ravens:

Lions and Ravens are both in first place leading their northern divisions. They are also both reside in pretty terrible cities. I know there are some nice areas around both before people start to get mad at me. But the actual Baltimore and Detroit cities are pretty rough. Speaking of being rough, lets talk about the life of a Lions fan. They last won a championship in 1957. Ouch. In the last 66 years they have made the playoffs 12 times. They have won exactly 1 playoff game. 1? 1 damn playoff game? How is that even possible. When you complain about your favorite sports team, just remember the Lions. The Ravens have had much more recent success. Their biggest problem is much like their city, their team is broken or will be soon. I call them the 49ers of the East because they have so many injuries. Typically all their running backs get hurt before week 5 and often before the season even starts. Except for their best running back, Lamar. He usually gets hurt later in the year. These two teams play tough defense have some good offensive weapons and seem to be trending in the right direction. Usually when I see evenly matched teams, I roll with the home team. But I am going with crazy Dan Campbell and boring Jared Goff in this one. The Lions bite the Ravens knee caps leading to more injuries and a Detroit victory.

Lions 23 Ravens 20

The Best of the Worst: Falcons @ Bucs

With the Saints loss last night, these two boring and average teams will battle it out for sole possession of this terrible division. The winner will have 4 wins and be nearly half way to the total needed to win the division. Neither team has been terrible and neither has been impressive. I am not at all excited about this one, but with 6 teams on bye, I got to write about something. Both these teams have some good players but are lacking at the QB position. Desmond Ridder hasn’t done anything to inspire confidence. Baker went from pretty good to slightly below average last week. This has low scoring fg fest written all over it. The Falcons like to run the ball and avoid throwing to Drake London and Kyle Pitts. The Bucs have to avoid running the ball because their running backs suck. Luckily, I’ll be tailgating with Chiefs Kingdom so I won’t have to watch much of this snooze fest. I don’t believe in either coach at all. I don’t really believe in either QB either so I’ll go with Baker who I have slightly more confidence in. How bad is your QB when I have more confidence in Baker? And the Bucs are at home. So fire up the stupid cannons or whatever.

Bucs 20 Falcons 13

The Glad I won’t be home game: Packers @ Broncos

As you know, my wife’s favorite team is the Broncos. My son’s favorite team is the Packers. I love my son very much but he is pretty awful to watch football games with. He gets very emotional and upset about things and will say “we are going to lose” 5 or 6 minutes into the game. He also is almost 15 and apparently in the last year has dramatically expanded his knowledge on all things because he seems to know everything about everything. Luckily for Danielle and I we get to reap the benefits of his new found knowledge as he is happy to tell us how much he is right and how wrong we are. Unfortunately, this new found knowledge of all things has not translated to the classroom according to his grades. He especially likes to talk down to my wife about football things. If you have met Danielle you know that one of her favorite things is to be corrected. She used to always call Ohio State, Ohio instead. I would say it’s Ohio State and she would say, thank you so much for pointing that out to me. I really appreciate it. In case my text isn’t clear, this is sarcasm. She hates being corrected. What she hates even more than being corrected is her 14 year old son telling her how things are which he does a lot in general but really likes to do during football games. To top things off, the Broncos have been terrible and her Sundays have been pretty miserable. So now her options are her team loses to her son’s team and he talks down to her about football or her team beats his team and he throws a fit about how the Packers suck, etc. It’s a lose, lose for her. Typically I play mediator in these scenarios which is another lose, lose situation. But I’ll be in arrowhead and oblivious to the whole thing. Anyway, I don’t think the Packers are very good but the Broncos are just a hot mess. Sean Payton was going to change all the things but they sure look a lot like last year’s team only the defense is worse. This game will likely go down to the wire to make the whole situation that much more miserable for the Danielle. I’m guessing the Broncos get up early so that most of the first half she gets to hear Walker talk about how his team sucks and everything sucks. And then in the second half the Packers come back just in time for Walker to explain football to her.

Packers 24 Broncos 20

Football Extravaganza Game 2: Chargers @ Chiefs

In case it isn’t abundantly clear yet, I am going to the Chiefs game on Sunday. For those of you who don’t know, I live in Colorado but flew into KC today. I must say that DIA is a complete disaster. I almost missed my flight because all the parking at the airport was full. How does this even happen? How can it always be full? Does no one ever leave? The signs told me to go to the Pikes Peak lot so I did. Once I arrived there I found out that it was also full. I definitely should have ubered to the airport. Then I had to find another lot. Once I got in there, I drove around for another 20 minutes finding a spot. I was just about to give up when I found a spot that was tight but I was able to squeeze into. Then I had to wait around for a shuttle. Luckily, I have Clear and was able to get through security quickly. The flight was delayed a little bit which was the first time I have ever been excited about my flight being delayed. Anyway, I made it but that is why this blog is coming out so late. We start our football extravaganza tomorrow as we head to the Mizzou game. It will be a day full of tailgating followed by the Mizzou game followed by more tailgating. Then my brother and I will wake up on Sunday and do it all over again at Arrowhead. Although I am a die hard fan, I have not been to Arrowhead since my senior year of high school. My brother said he hasn’t been there since Todd Blackledge was quarterback. We are both obviously excited to be there again and watch the greatness of Patrick Mahomes. We play the Chargers so people are predicting a close game. To be fair most of our games are close and pretty much all Chargers games are close. Patrick has only lost 3 division games as a starter which is just a ridiculous stat. But 2 of those have been against the Chargers. This will be a great test for our defense but I like our chances. We are do for a good offensive game. Plus Patrick is Patrick. Old Jeff before Patrick would assume we would lose because I worked so hard to get there and that is just my luck. But new Jeff (who is technically old) with Patrick believes we are always going to win. That used to be an odd feeling but now it is just the way it is and it is beautiful. The most common question I have gotten from people is are you excited to see Taylor Swift. One, we will not see her where we are sitting. And two, no, I don’t care about seeing Taylor Swift. I am really excited to see Patrick Mahomes play in person. I think they put on a show for us because Justin and I deserve it damn it. But regardless of the result it is going to be an awesome football extravaganza weekend!

Chiefs 31 Chargers 20

Tua, Tyreek and the Tush Push: Dolphins @ Eagles

Two of the best teams in the league will meet up for the Football Extravaganza night cap. These are two of the more fun teams to watch. Both teams have a lot of good players and both have good young coaches. Mike McDaniel is one of my favorite people in the sport. He is funny and smart an obvious nerd. He has the Dolphins rolling over bad teams. The problem is the one time they played a good team, they got rolled themselves. The Eagles lost their first game last week to the Jets. They haven’t looked great but you can tell all the pieces are there. The Eagles secondary is a little beat up which isn’t ideal when you are playing Tyreek. Tyreek is on pace for like 3 thousand yards receiving. However, the Dolphins D isn’t all that good so the Eagles should be able to score as well. There should be lots of offense in this one with a lot of explosive plays. But I think it comes down to the good old tush push that no one can stop or replicate. The Eagles bounce back from their loss and edge out the Dolphins in a fun and entertaining game. But Tyreek still gets a bunch of yards and Tua continues his streak of games without being concussed. I am sure it is due to the karate he learned in the offseason.

Eagles 34 Dolphins 28