It’s Wild Card Weekend! And it used to be truly wild. You didn’t know what upset might happen. But since they added the unnecessary 7 seed, things have gotten less wild. The 7 seed is 0-4 the last two years. And there has really only been one significant upset two years ago when the Browns beat the Steelers. Typically the home team or favored team has won the last two years. To make things even more boring, all these games are rematches from earlier in the year and 3 of the games will be teams playing for the 3rd time. I mean, I am still going to watch, but I am less excited about it. Let’s see if this weekend will truly be wild again.

The Rain Game: Seahawks @ 49ers

The Seahawks limped into the playoffs with a 9-8 record. They did win their last two game over the Jets and a beat up Rams team. Before that they had lost 3 in a row. This will be the 3rd rematch of these two teams with the 49ers winning both match ups. The 49ers are arguably the hottest team in football after rattling off 10 straight wins. The got super cool and collected Brock Purdy at QB who is the 3rd string Quarterback but also apparently their best QB. This will be the biggest stage he has played on but not much seems to matter to him. Maybe he is that cool under pressure or maybe he is just too young to understand the magnitude of the situation. Either way he has been great and lifted the 49ers to the next level. There is supposed to be some weather involved in this one which is my main purpose of watching. If it is not raining and windy, this game will not be very entertaining. Geno Smith is a great story and I find it funny that the Seahawks made it to the Playoffs without Russ. But Russ was actually the X factor against the 49ers. He barely ever lost to them. It is like these games are the only time Seattle misses Russ. I am going to assume there is weather and that slows everything down and makes this a little closer and little more low scoring than it would be normally. I’ll I am cheering for in this one is heavy rain.

49ers 23 Seahawks 13

The Battle of the Hair: Chargers @ Jaguars

This is the game I am most excited to watch. And not just because my hair is thinning out and these two quarterbacks have lovely locks. This in my opinion is the most evenly matched game of the weekend. The Jags are riding high winning their first division title in a few years. The Chargers are probably just happy to actually be in the playoffs. Both teams have very good and mobile quarterbacks. They have solid defenses and enough weapons to make this a fun one. The Chargers have the overall better roster but it will be a little bit limited this weekend. Despite the Ravens losing and the Chargers being completely unaffected as far as playoff seeding whether the won or lost in week 18, Brandon Staley rolled out his starters and made them play most of the game against Denver. We didn’t see Chase Daniel until the 4th quarter which is a tragedy, because you can’t see enough of Chase playing. Several Charger players went down including Mike Williams who has been injured off and on for most of the season. He was hurt so bad that he isn’t playing this weekend. Staley’s excuse was you only have so many guys. Which makes absolutely no sense because they have played like half their games without Williams. To add insult to injury (literal injury), the Chargers lost the game to the lowly Broncos. Staley has shown himself to not be the best decision maker over the last couple of years. In an evenly matched game, give me the coach who has won a super bowl over the guy who can’t even bring his whole team to Jacksonville because he is an idiot and plays injury prone players for no reason.

Jaguars 27 Chargers 24

The “Do we have to?” Game: Dolphins @ Bills

Really, do we have to play this game? Honestly the 7 seed is pointless. Lets go back to 6 and give the 2 seed a bye. And this is coming from a guy who always wants to watch more football. Look if Tua was playing this might be fun. But I have seen nothing from Skylar Thompson that makes me think he can help the Dolphins even keep this close. My favorite thing about Skylar is that he is a Missouri boy from Independence but we all know that Missouri Quarterbacks are only good at being back up quarterbacks not starters. (We see you Drew Lock and Blaine Gabbert!). They have absolutely no hope in this game. Tyreek is obviously good at making all quarterbacks look better but not even he could help Skylar look good against the Jets.

Meanwhile, the Bills have all the motivation in the world. They were already probably the most motivated team in the league after the coin toss game last year. And now they are playing for Damar. I think it is fair to say that this game will not be close. The Bills are better than the Dolphins with Tua. They are certainly better than the Dolphins with Skylar.

Bills 38 Dolphins 10

The Obvious One Score Game: Giants @ Vikings

The Giants have definitely over achieved. Brian Daboll should probably be coach of the year. He has this team in the playoffs and has made Daniel Jones a functional quarterback. On the other side Kevin O’Connell could also claim the spot taking a troubled Vikings team to a 13-4 record. These teams of course, already played. Shockingly to no one that has followed the Vikings, it was a close game. The Vikings did finally win a second game by more than one score in week 18. But it was against the Bears…without Justin Fields. Meanwhile, the Giants, unlike the idiot Chargers, rested their starters and were still competitive against the Eagles.

The Vikings have Kirk Cousins who is terrible in big moments. But they also have Dalvin Cook and Justin Jefferson. The Giants have Saquon Barkley and…and…and…I guess that is it. I follow football pretty closely but I had to google Giants receivers to come up with this awesome list, Darius Slayton, Richie James, Isaiah Hodgins and the infamous Kenny Golladay. Boy did he turn that one good year in Detroit into a rip off of a payoff.

I actually really like the Giants and was leaning towards picking them. But while typing this I have talked myself out of it. The Vikings have a big play late to Justin Jefferson of course and win a close one.

Vikings 31 Giants 28

The Unlikable game: Ravens @ Bengals

I don’t like these teams. I don’t like these players. I don’t like this game. This is another 3rd time matchup game. This one is the worst one of the bunch. Both teams have won one. But the Ravens won with Lamar. They have been awful and boring since Lamar got hurt. Unfortunately, their defense is playing better which means they will likely slow down the high powered Bengals offense to make this game even more of a drag. Harbaugh is actually 6-0 in road playoff games on Wild Card Weekend. It’s an odd stat for sure. If they had Lamar then I might give them a shot. But right now they aren’t even sure if Tyler Huntley is going to be able to play. Meanwhile the Bengals are all pissy like always. The coin flip thing made them mad. Joe Burrow is cocky, Joe Mixon got fined for flipping a coin in the end zone, they got screwed by a hypothetical playoff scenario that didn’t actually happen, blah, blah, blah. I am sure the Bengals will win big. That is all I have to say about this one. It is too boring to write anything else about it.

Bengals 34 Ravens 16

The Choke vs the Goat: Cowboys @ Bucs

We end wild card weekend with the Monday Night game, another change with the added 7 seed. The 12-5 Cowboys, who all the media want me to believe are good head to Tampa to face the 8-9 Bucs. Nothing better than a team with a losing record hosting a playoff game. It is right up there with a tie during the regular season. Anyway, we get Joe Buck and Troy Aikman or you can watch the Manning Cast. I got to say Eli is underrated. Not as a Quarterback but has a funny person. Dude, is sly and hilarious. Best part of the Manning cast.

The Cowboys are known choke artists. Dak throws a ton of interceptions and Mike McCarthy is a disaster in the playoffs. It is hard for me to cheer for Brady but there is nothing better than a media meltdown when the Cowboys lose in the playoffs. Plus, I always love when Skip Bayless has to talk about “my Dallas Cowboys” in a negative light. I am as big of a Chiefs fan as it gets. And even I sometimes slide into the “we” talk. Like we need to win this game or we need a new right tackle. As if I am actually part of the team and have any influence at all. But I would never say “My Kansas City Chiefs” like I own the team. And certainly wouldn’t do it as a national commentator that is supposed to be unbiased. Yet another reason to hate Skip.

Anyway, on the other side you have Todd Bowles who is pretty good at coaching defense and Tom Brady who is the greatest playoff quarterback of all time. The Bucs roster is better than their record and they might be getting a few guys back. Plus, I mean, it’s Brady…at home. Is he really losing this game? I don’t think so. I’ll take the Goat over the Choke for the win.

Bucs 27 Cowboys 20