We are back. We took Five for Friday off as I was doing much preparation for the Christmas festivities as I am sure you were as well. I am sure that is why I didn’t get any messages saying, “Hey Jeff, when are were getting our 5 for Friday.” Anyway we are back this week and there will be a Five for Friday this week. Week 16 is in the books and some NFL fans got some nice gifts for Christmas while others got gifts worse than coal (I see you Broncos fans). Let’s dive into the Rankings.

Playing in the Super Bowl: Bills and Eagles

The Bills struggled for a half with the Bears and then they didn’t anymore. This was a trap game for sure and it isn’t shocking that they came out a little sluggish. What was probably surprising for them was having to spend an extra night in Chicago followed by arriving back home and having to dig their cars out of 8 feet of snow. Good times in Buffalo. The Eagles lost a close game to the Cowboys…in Dallas…without their starting quarterback. Gardner Minshew almost led them to the victory so I am confident with Hurts they would have won. They have the unique opportunity this week to clinch the division and home field advantage and improve their draft position all with a win. Somehow the Eagles have the Saints first round draft pick this year. There are other teams that can win this thing but I still think these are the two most complete teams.

The Contenders: Bengals, 49ers, Chiefs

These are the other 3 teams I think can win the Super Bowl. The 49ers continue to win and seem to be a better team with Brock Purdy. They are actually getting healthy (49er fans are yelling at me not to say it out loud). They have a solid roster all the way around. I guess the question is, can Brock Purdy lead them to the show? The Bengals squeaked one out against the Patriots. The Bengals were up 22-0 and then didn’t score again. The Patriots were about to win the game when Stevenson fumbled. He’s had a rough couple of weeks after starting the lateral fiasco last week and then fumbling inside the 20 this week. He also crushed my chances of making it to the championship in Danielle’s work league. He scored 1.3 points. Ouch. Anyway, the Bengals have a good football team. They have been hit with the injury bug a bit as of late. They’ve got a massive game hosting the Bills this week. The Chiefs actually won by more than one score. The offense looked a little off at times but they also had several dropped passes that hurt them. The defense looked…dare I say good? The Seahawks have struggled and they were missing a player or two but the D really held their own. They had good pressure on the Quarterback and did enough to slow down the run. They also came up big on crucial 3rd and 4th downs. Also, Mahomes is amazing. Since the start of 2019 season he is now 16-0 against the NFC. The only team he hasn’t beaten is the Vikings because he was hurt and we won that game anyway. We haven’t lost a regular season game to an NFC team since Rodgers barely outplayed Mat Moore and the Packers beat us in 2019. Pretty impressive.

Ready to break your heart in the playoffs: Vikings and Cowboys

These two teams have playoff upset written all over them. The Vikings have won an amazing 11 one score games. Guys, they only have 12 wins. Their only non one score victory was week 1. That’s insane. Their luck is bound to run out. I guess you could argue they are just a really clutch team but I won’t. The Cowboys barely beat the Eagles minus Jalen Hurts at home. Assuming Tampa wins the South, I can certainly envision them going down there and leaving with an L. Plus over the past 20 years or so both of these teams have excelled at playoff disappointment.

Here comes the hype train: Chargers

The national media loves them some Chargers. They are always a preseason darling but then they disappoint. But now they have won 3 in a row and so they are currently Super Bowl contenders. During that 3 game win streak they have beaten the Dolphins who are on a 4 game skid (that I predicted). They beat the Titans who have lost like 5 in a row and just lost to the Texans and a Colts team that is a complete disaster. Look, they have a solid team and are getting healthy but its not like they are putting up 50 points a game in these wins. Maybe they could beat one of the Chiefs, Bills or Bengals in the playoffs but there is no way they are beating 2 or 3 of them to make it to the Super Bowl.

Teams you don’t want to play in the Playoffs: Jaguars and Packers

I thought the Jaguars were a year away but they have arrived early. They should win the next two weeks to clinch the AFC South. Much like the Chargers, they have what it takes to knock off one of the big 3. And this time next year, we will be talking about the big 4. Mahomes, Allen, Burrow and Lawrence should own their divisions for the next 10 years. It should be fun. As for the Packers, I have been saying it for a few weeks now but they are dangerous. Their roster is way better than their record. Their defense is playing better and their offense is doing enough to win without Rodgers playing great. He has a funny confidence about him. They host the Vikings and Lions in back to back weeks. I still think they win out. They need the Commanders to lose one more which I think also happens.

Playoff bound…I guess: Giants and Ravens

Ravens have clinched. The Giants can clinch if they win this week and they play the Colts…so…that’s pretty much a given. But if the two above teams are the teams you don’t want to play in the playoffs, these are the two you want to play.

Fighting for their playoff lives: Commanders, Dolphins, Patriots, Jets, Steelers, Lions, Seahawks, Titans

Somehow all these teams are still mathematically in it. The Commanders are probably going to lose out because they went back to Carson Wentz. No one knows who they are starting this week but a QB controversy in week 17 probably doesn’t equal playoffs. The Dolphins have lost 4 in a row and Tua is concussed…again. They head to the Patriots and then host the Jets. If Tua plays I think they win out but if he can’t go that opens the door for one of the challengers. The Patriots are finding new ways to lose and the poor Jets had to roll with Zach Wilson in back to back weeks. He literally not only sucks but makes everyone around him suck. He’s terrible. Matt White is back this week and I actually think they can win out even though they have two road games against the Seahawks and Dolphins. This would break the current longest drought of not making the playoffs. If the Jets make it then the title would go to the Broncos which would sort of be funny since some were picking them to win the super bowl this year. The Steelers have never had a losing season under Tomlin and somehow it is possible that streak will continue. They have the Ravens this week and the Browns next week. I think they keep that streak alive but they will need help to get in. The Seahawks and Lions both hurt their chances this week with losses. They like the Packers need the Commanders to lose at least one more. The Titans are about to finish the year on a 7 game losing streak. It should be an interesting couple of weeks but none of these teams are doing much if they get in.

The 2020 NFC East: The 2022 NFC South

We just need Tampa to lose one more game to assure that a team with a losing record hosts a playoff game. I love these sort of scenarios because it shows the occasional crack in the system that everyone gets all upset about. I mean yes this might happen two times in 3 years but overall in the history of the NFL it is very rare. But I am sure people will throw a fit and make changes to the playoff system. Regardless in order for that to happen, the Panthers likely need to win in Tampa. The Panthers have been significantly better at home but stranger things have happened. I am sure that this will be another close game and Brady will likely lead his team to victory again this week but it will be funny if he loses. The Saints are some how still in contention too. This division is real bad.

No one cares: Rams, Browns, Cardinals

The Rams won big this week on Christmas day but the story isn’t even about them. The Browns have somehow gotten worse with Massage Boy at QB. They are trying to compete for worst offseason trade but they can’t even win at that. Broncos are the clear winner. The Cardinals are so bad that JJ Watt is retiring and their coach is apparently contemplating leaving.

Raiders gonna Raider: They still got it

Two weeks ago, the Raiders won in the most improbable way. So what happens this week? They go back to their old habits of losing close games. They are the anti Vikings losing 8 games by one score. McDaniel even acknowledged they might bench Carr. This team is a disaster. They scored 10 points this past week. They finish out the year hosting the 49ers and the Chiefs. So in good news, they probably will lose by a lot more than one score in those games.

Still sort of fun: Bears

Justin Fields is apparently trying to make it to next year so he didn’t run much against the Bills. He also isn’t as good at throwing when the threat of him running isn’t there. Hopefully they are more fun this week when they play at the Lions.

Still terrible but not the worst anymore: Texans

The Texans almost beat the Cowboys and Chiefs in back to back weeks and then upset the Titans this week. The Titans aren’t great but the Texans don’t beat anyone so this is a big win. I am sure by early next year they will find there way back to the bottom because they are a very poorly run organization but they can enjoy being 3rd worst at least for this week.

Dumb and Dumber: Colts

The Colts traded for Carson Wentz. That didn’t work. Then they traded for Matt Ryan. That didn’t work. Then they benched Matt Ryan and that didn’t work. Then they fired their coach and hired a guy with slightly more experience than me. That didn’t work. Then they benched Matt Ryan again. Going to Nick Foles at this point in the season is sort of like when you are playing Madden and getting your butt kicked so you just put in the 3rd string QB to see what happens. It never works and it didn’t work for the Colts either. They somehow got worse offensively. At this point they might want to try what Walker does if I am beating him and put the punter at Quarterback. Unconventional times lead to unconventional tactics. I mean if you are going to hire an ESPN guy as your coach, why not have your punter play QB? It honestly can’t get worse offensively. Speaking of bad offense…check out our final team.

A very bumpy ride just got even bumpier: Broncos

Let’s ride…over a cliff. That was perhaps the worst performance I have seen in a very long time. Early on Russ had thrown 3 passes and 2 interceptions. It somehow got worse from there. The defense finally said screw it and gave up 51 points to Baker Mayfield and the Rams. To add to the fun the Broncos back up QB and an offensive lineman got in a shoving match on the sideline. Then Randy Gregory went and punched a Ram player after the game. Things were so bad that they woke up the next morning and fired Nathanial Hackett. He was not a good coach but hardly the only problem. Despite everyone speculating that this was a great roster and all they needed was a Quarterback, there wasn’t any real proof of that. It turns out this roster is pretty average when it is healthy and real bad when they have as many injuries as they did. Then you bring in Russ who apparently no one in the league likes and you treat him like he is the greatest QB of all time. Turns out there was a reason the Seahawks were so eager to trade him. Things are so bad that the defensive coordinator turned down the interim head coaching gig. This is actually a genius move by him. As of now, he is a hot coaching commodity as the guy who kept the Broncos in most games despite the worst offense in Broncos history. If he takes the interim gig, then he is the guy who was head coach for two weeks and got smashed by the Chiefs and Chargers. Nothing good can come from it. So who is the interim coach? The guy they brought in to run clock management. Yes you are reading it correctly. I mean, it’s not an ESPN analyst but it is pretty close. Amazingly, this team was better when Drew Lock was quarterback.

Playoff Predictions AFC:

1. Bills
2. Chiefs
3. Bengals
4. Jaguars
5. Chargers
6. Ravens
7. Jets

Playoff Predictions NFC:

1. Eagles
2. 49ers
3. Vikings
4. Bucs
5. Cowboys
6. Giants
7. Packers